Why Lawyers Should Plan Fun for Mental Health

These days, part of being a lawyer is learning how to manage your mental health in a busy schedule. The last few weeks have been pretty hectic for me. Billable hours demands shot up rapidly. I had extra back to school meetings to attend for my kids. And I am still working through the final steps on my first novel.

In the midst of all of this, it can be hard to find time for fun and personal satisfaction. That’s why this post is about why lawyers should plan their fun and build it into their calendars.

Lawyers Are Too Busy Not to Plan Ahead

Lawyers are busy people and sometimes this can get in the way of planning fun things for ourselves. It’s easy to think of activities done purely for our personal enjoyment as non-priorities. After all, client demands, billable hours, and family obligations have big claims on our time and attention.

If this is taken to the extreme, though, lawyers will never make time for ourselves. It’s not like the obligations above truly ever stop. However, the only way to make them pause it to set personal boundaries.

In my experience, it’s not enough to set a weak boundary by merely setting a passive intention to make time for yourself. Instead, it works better to set a firm boundary by making real plans. This means, buying the tickets, marking the event on your calendar, and committing to plans with friends or loved ones.

As a young lawyer, I struggled with this a lot because I worried that I would get busy and have to break my plans. This may have happened once or twice over the years, but it was usually pretty rare. Why? Because lawyers manipulate schedules every day under time pressure to get the job done. If a conflict arose that threatened my big plans, I was usually able to navigate it.

Image with quote that says "Lawyers are busy. If we don't plan for fun, we may never have any."

Planning Ahead Means You Have Something Fun to Look Forward To

Now, you may be thinking that planning fun sounds like a lot of work in the calendar of a busy lawyer. You are right. But the effort is worth it. The other good news about planning ahead is that it gives you something to look forward to.

This is more important than you may realize. As an example, I have two concerts with my favorite singers coming up this week. I put these concerts on my personal and work calendars to make sure I got out of the office on time. Though that decision was practical, it had a nice side effect.

Every time I looked at my calendar to check a date for a hearing or deposition, I saw my reminder that the concerts were getting closer. Each time I saw this, I smiled and felt happy and excited.

My favorite time management expert, Laura Vanderkam, would say this is a great benefit of future planning. By doing this, we don’t just get to enjoy the event itself. Instead, we get to enjoy the anticipation as we look forward to it too.

For lawyers who have calendars that are often filled with things that are not happy or fun, the impact of this is huge. We can’t always control how our work days go, but with planning we can build in joy into our evenings and days off.

A Simple Way for Lawyers to Plan Their Fun

I’ll be honest. Though I generally love my law practice, there are certain aspects that are really stressful. One of the ways I have learned to cope with this what I call the “bookend” approach.

By this, I mean that where possible I sandwich difficult things on may calendar with good things. In most situations, I find it works best to start with prioritizing self-care and end with something fun or celebratory.

As an example, if I have a trial or hearing coming up I will prioritize my personal self-care routines as much as possible. For me, this of course means meditation, exercise, and sleep. In some situations, I may also prepare some meals ahead to give myself a break from trial prep and give myself one less chore at home during the week of trial.

Then, after the difficult period is over, I plan something nice for myself. Sometimes this is big and sometimes this is small. I may take the day off to go take a long hike or make plans to see a movie or a show. Or maybe I will just plan to cook a new recipe or make reservations at a great restaurant.

Image with quote that says "Planning fun things is important for lawyers. Having good things to look forward to boosts our mental health."

A Small Shift for More Fun

Now, some lawyers may be reading this and think “this is not earth shattering.” To be honest, that’s what I hope you think. Planning good things is really just part of a good life. If you are already doing this regularly, you may not need to do anything new or different.

As I mentioned, though, many lawyers don’t do this regularly or fall out of the habit of doing so. I was like that years ago, especially when my kids were little. It always felt like I had no energy and no time.

What I learned when I paid more attention, was that I had time but I needed to exert more agency over it. The big shift for me was the recognition that fun, relaxation, and new experiences were priorities.

After a few attempts, I saw that all the time and effort for fun experiences was well worth it. For example, though a concert might take time, travel, or keep me up past my bedtime, it also usually gave me an experience of community and memories I could not forget.

This strategy–planning fun things–is definitely a small shift, but it is one that can make a big difference for lawyers.

Go Make a Plan for Something Fun

I don’t argue that everything in life can or should be planned. Certainly, lawyers just like everyone else can use some time for surprises and spontaneity. But the truth is that busy people have to plan if they want to prioritize things that matter to them. Fun should matter to lawyers because’ it’s essential for our mental health. I hope this post helps you make more room in your calendar for fun. ‘

Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, How to Be a Badass Lawyer, for a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.

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How Meditation Can Help Lawyers Manage Overthinking

I have written before that mindfulness meditation has helped me manage overthinking. But I haven’t yet talked about the steps I take to deal with a specific attack of rumination.

When I first started meditating, I had pretty severe issues with thoughts. I experienced racing thoughts on a regular basis. Sometimes I let them spiral so much that I literally sat frozen in fear, with no idea how to make it all stop.

After years of meditation, that has calmed down. I can see anxiety coming and catch it much earlier. Recently, I realized that a vague spinning of my mind with no clear thoughts was the initial phase of overthinking. When I see this arise, I know meditation is the answer.

Because overthinking is a common problem for lawyers, this post will walk through the meditation steps that help me deal with it.

Recognize Overthinking and Take Action to Stop It

I have written before that not every situation calls for mindfulness. Sometimes, too much energy or too many rapid thoughts mean I have to try something else. Even so, over the years I have come to see that there are many situations in which meditation really helps.

The calling card for me which says it’s time to sit is what I will call the “vague thinking mind.” This is when I can feel myself passively thinking but without a clear object. My mind feels like the spinning wheel that shows up on your laptop when it’s trying to load. At the same time, though, I can feel that I am not in a great mood and generally feel ill at ease.

These are admittedly subtle cues. It took me years to identify them. After years of mindfulness practice, I now know that it is phase 1 of an attack of anxiety and rumination. Though this process is largely mental, I have come to see that my thinking is a symptom of fear.

When my thoughts are nonspecific but won’t stop, that’s a clear sign my thinking is not useful or productive.

Meditation Can Calm the Mind without Digging into Thoughts

Lawyers may struggle with this next one. Instead of poking and prodding to try to make my thoughts make sense, it works a lot better to take a break from them. Of course, meditation does not mean we banish all of our thoughts. If you are new to mindfulness, you can’t expect to sit down and immediately have a spotless mind.

I, however, have been practicing for more than a decade. I know my mind very well. Though my mind used to be overactive in the past, it has now slowed down to bearable levels. In addition, I know that after a few minutes of breath focus, my mind will eventually cool it.

This gives me a chance to sit and rest for a moment. My once foggy brain suddenly feels clear. It stops spinning and I can see what’s really going on.

Notice here that I am not saying that I meditate and immediately ask myself what my deal is. I know this can be a difficult habit for lawyers to break. If you can, resist the urge to dig into the thoughts and put them under an internal microscope. I also don’t judge myself or tell myself to cut it out.

Instead, I give my mind another job to do – focus on the breath. That helps me calm down and take a rest from the spinning wheels.

Greet Your Emotions with Mindfulness

Have you ever been upset about a problem and it felt overwhelming? Then you calmed down and suddenly you could see how to fix it? Lawyers probably have a lot of experience with this. In much the same way, when I calm down in meditation I feel like I can handle things. In fact, I usually feel like I can handle almost anything that comes up.

There’s a simple word for this. It’s safety. When I meditate and calm down enough, I feel safe again. That safety gives me confidence.

With safety restored and the spinning wheel in my mind paused, I can parse through what is bugging me. Again, I don’t dig into this directly. My mind and body usually tell me what they need. They may supply thoughts or memories about something that has bothered me.

More likely than not, emotions may arise in my heart or belly. My years of practice serve me well here. I just sit with them and feel. This isn’t always pleasant but it doesn’t last too long. I let them come, deliver their message, and go.

As someone with anxiety, these emotions are usually some variety of fear. Sometimes loneliness, boredom, frustration, or sadness make an appearance.

Care for the Fear Underlying the Overthinking

Then I usually finish my sit with some form of heart (or kindness) practice. Most of the time it is a variety of loving-kindness. More recently, and especially with my episodes of anxiety thinking mind, I have focused a lot on compassion for myself.

I wish myself well, offering phrases like these:

May I experience belonging;
May I take care of myself;
May my suffering come to an end;
May I accept my own goodness; o
May I greet my life with joy;
May I ask for and accept help;
May I remember goodness; and
May I trust myself.

Sure, these phrases are soft and may seem awkward to many lawyers. They are vulnerable. Years ago, I probably wouldn’t have been brave enough to share them with anyone. But if you say these phrases to yourself enough, you start to believe them.

The long story short here is that I respond to my own emotions and all my mental worry with care. Instead of judgment, I respond with kindness. I don’t make myself false promises. These aren’t affirmations that life will always be rosy and my fears will never materialize.

Instead, they are restatements of my values and new commitments to them. In their own way, they are like a tiny plan b. If my worst fears do arise, how I will get through it? With kindness and trust in myself and by seeking out and accepting help from others.

Image listing the 4 steps to manage overthinking in meditation for lawyers as shared in this post

This Is How Meditation Can Help Lawyers Tend to Overthinking

This is how meditation helps me fight off overthinking. Sure, this takes some time and practice. Most of my mindfulness sessions are about thirty minutes. And I have practiced this for over a decade. But this time is usually well spent.

Not only do I get my mindfulness practice done for the day. I get to spend the rest of my time more clear-headed and less worried. This means I can engage more directly in whatever activities I have planned for the day. It also means I can be totally present for the good thing and joyful moments that arise.

If you are dealing with overthinking that is more intense, other strategies may be necessary before you can tolerate sitting meditation. That’s okay. If you give yourself time and patience, you eventually will be able to see the signs of anxiety and rumination earlier and earlier. And then you can figure out how meditation can support you best as you deal with it.

As a warning to the lawyers out there, the point here is not perfection. The point here is not to banish all thoughts. Instead, the point is to stay present in our lives with an open heart even though our minds struggle to cope with the reality of our lives. As this post shows, though, we can learn to do that and meditation can help.

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Letter from the Future: Lessons from 300 Blog Posts

Editor’s Note: I’m proud to celebrate 300 posts this week, but I’m also finalizing the edits on my new book. I was at a loss about how to recognize the occasion, so I researched some of my old posts. When I reached the 10-year anniversary of my mindfulness practice, I wrote this post with a letter from my future self. It made me proud to read it and I decided to write another. This letter is written to myself back in December 2020 when I launched the blog. Please enjoy and if you are thinking of starting writing and need a pep talk please reach out to me!

Dear Claire,

This is you from the future again. I know I wrote you a few years ago. I found that letter again recently and liked it so much that I decided to write a new one. Sorry if this is annoying. I promise I won’t start texting you or messaging you on LinkedIn.

Instead, I’ll keep my messages restricted to milestone moments. You have another one this week. You hit 300 posts on this blog! Can you believe it?

How Did 300 Blog Posts Happen?

I bet you can’t. I know when you started this blog in 2020 you weren’t sure what would happen. You didn’t know much about blogging. You just liked writing and and mindfulness and needed a a place to put your words.

Remember how you used to worry that you were making a big mistake by starting a blog? You were always so worried that you would run out of time or ideas.

Way back when, even before the blog, do you remember how you worried about whether you could write one blog post a month? For the last six years, you have been writing almost 1 post every week. And you have written and edited books along the way too?

You Managed the Blog Week by Week

It’s pretty amazing what can happen when we let it. Isn’t it?

I hope that I’m not making your head spin by talking about 300 blog posts. I know you are new to this whole blogging thing and taking it week by week. Claire, I want you to know that is exactly how you should take it.

Your schedule, like the schedules of other lawyers, is irregular. It can change on a dime. It will change wildly as you go through two job changes, raise kids, and become a popular speaker.

The blog may seem hard to manage now at the beginning, but just wait until you have even more things to manage. But don’t be scared. I’m not trying to warn you here. Instead, I’m saying that you will grow.

Writing Became a Calling

Writing isn’t a chore for you. It’s not a job. It’s something that is a part of you. Or at least eventually it will become that way. In fact, I’m going to go ahead and use an arguably cheesy term here. Writing for you is a calling.

For many years, Claire, you refused that call. You doubted yourself, and told yourself you were too busy. You believed the lie that, as a lawyer, you were only allowed to bill hours. Or you fell prey to the related lie that any free time should be devoted exclusively to your children.

But somehow, you pushed through all that crap. Somehow you saw the truth that those lies swirling in your head were just doubt. They were the same doubts you’d had your whole life.

Blogging Became an Essential Practice

I won’t lie to you. This blog does not make those doubts go away. I actually just wrote a post about doubt last week. It’s still alive and well. But you know what? You have learned that writing a blog post is a great way to work through big emotions.

In addition, Claire, you should know that the doubt arose because you are editing your first novel. Yes, you wrote a novel or at least a fable about mindfulness. This means that doubt keeps arising because you continue to take risks and try new things.

How were you able to try writing fiction, which was very new to you? You were able to do that because you haven’t just been training the skill of writing all these years. Instead, you have been training discipline, self-confidence, and listening to your inner voice.

Quote that says "Thank you for reading" to celebrate writing 300 blog posts about mindfulness for lawyers

Just Keep Writing, Even When It’s Hard

I know that this blog is still new to you, Claire. I know you aren’t sure where it’s headed. I’m writing to tell you it’s headed in a good direction. You just have to keep writing.

Will it be easy? Absolutely not. You will write many – if not most – of the posts last minute. You will lack motivation and inspiration some weeks and sometimes feel like you are just going through the motions. Some weeks, you will skip writing a post because you just can’t deal with it. Sometimes it will feel pretty lonely.

But of course, you know that’s okay. You have already learned how to get off track and came back, over and over again, with your meditation practice. So don’t stress when that happens. Don’t worry that the magic you found in writing will somehow leave you.

Instead, you’ll take breaks. You’ll live life for a while. And the ideas will come back when you are ready. And you will have so much fun.

Blog Posts Can Lead to Good Things

You’ll also meet people through your writing. People will find you on the internet and reach out to chat. You will make friends by showing up as yourself in your posts. You will also discover the writing will make networking and marketing your law practice so much easier.

Claire, let’s be honest, I can’t tell you that the blog will make you famous. I can’t say it will make you rich. I don’t promise that it will always be fun and you’ll never wonder if it’s too much work.

But I can say one thing with absolute confidence. People don’t do something 300 times because they get nothing out of it. They do a thing 300 times for a reason. You kept writing post after post because it was good for you. You kept writing because it brought you joy.

I know you probably feel unsure now at the beginning. It’s okay to feel unsure. It’s no big deal if you don’t have a clear plan. Just keep writing.

Thank you for trusting yourself and the rest of the world for starting this blog. Thanks for taking the time to build something new. It’s been a fun ride over these years. I can’t wait to see how many more we get!

With gratitude, Your Future Self

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How to Manage Doubt: Mindfulness Tips for Lawyers

As a mindfulness teacher, writer, and lawyer, I am no stranger to doubt. I used to regard it with fear and loathing. Now, I see it as my faithful friend. No matter what I do and how much I meditate, I can’t make doubt give up on me.

While that is oddly comforting in a way, it’s also super annoying. Even worse, this mental pattern of mine likes to show up at the worst possible times. If I am doing anything remotely challenging, new, or courageous, doubt chimes in at strategic moments to throw me off balance.

I’m currently working on finalizing the manuscript for my first work of fiction that I plan to publish later this year. Right on schedule, I had an attack of self-doubt this weekend.

Knowing that I am not alone with this mental habit and that my fellow lawyers share this trait, I will share the steps that I took to address my self-doubt attack.

Recognize When Doubt Arises.

Many of us know that naming emotions is really helpful. It can provide needed distance and clarity about our experience. This can help us avoid over-identifying with our fleeting emotional experiences.

This is essential for doubt. One problem with this state of mind is that it isn’t simple. Instead, doubt is a often a complex combination of emotions and thoughts. The emotions can distract, dis-empower, and stun us, while the thoughts pretend to the be the voice of reason.

As I have written before, though, doubt is a mental pattern that can rob us of motivation and courage when we need it most. This is why seeing doubt for what it is – as a mental pattern – can really help.

This may require patience to allow for sufficient time for self-investigation. However, I have come to learn that the feelings of fear, vulnerability, and overwhelm plus a series of despairing and negative thoughts are the calling cards of doubt for me. Another strong sign is that they usually show up when I about to do something meaningful, challenging, or innovative.

When I can name this melange of suckiness as doubt, I take the first step towards recovery. Though this doesn’t feel good, at least my guard is up and I know it’s time to fight back.

Image listing the 5 mindfulness tips to help lawyers handle doubt as shared in the blog post

Lawyers May Need a Self-Care Check.

Though I’m a lawyer, I’m still a mindfulness teacher. So when I say “fight back” I use that term metaphorically. As a younger and more foolish person, my doubt would sometimes prompt me to pick fights or argue to discharge the energy created by my fear.

My older, wiser self has learned that the better way to fight doubt is to disarm it. Instead of racing to discharge the fearful energy, I put it to good use by taking care of myself.

One of the most essential steps when it comes to doubt is to do a basic audit of my self-care needs. From experience, I know that doubt comes up for me when I feel overwhelmed, afraid, tired, or isolated. Most often this happens for practical reasons.

If I am working on a big project, I may not be sleeping well. I may also be skimping on social contact. Or I may be striving in pursuit of a goal and wearing myself out.

Returning to the basics of my self-care practices, including good nutrition, rest, exercise, and social support, helps put me in a better position to face whatever challenges come up in life. They also remind me that support and care, rather than force and pressure, are the best ways to achieve the goals I set for myself.

Don’t Face Doubt Alone.

If doubt were a person, it’s ride or die best friend would be shame. These two emotional besties have worked a number on me over the years. As an introvert who loves to overthink, they kept me on the ropes until I learned a tried and true strategy for driving a wedge between them.

That strategy is asking for help. Look, I know that lawyers and other professionals may hate doing this. As competent and highly skilled people, we may see ourselves as helpers. We may feel awkward and terrible when we have to “burden” someone else with our problems.

But here’s the thing. It’s hard to challenge doubt on your own. It’s even harder when shame jumps in and make you feel like you have to hide your feelings of vulnerability. One of the only ways to cut through this is to stop hiding by asking for help.

The biggest shift I have made to get over my attacks of self-doubt is that I now share my feelings with a friend, colleague or loved one. In the past, I used to try to deal with these emotions all on my own. Though meditation is a formidable tool, social support works better and faster.

Image sharing quote from the post which says "If doubt were a person, it's ride or die best friend would be shame. Drive a wedge between these emotional besties by getting help."

Engage Mindfulness and Allow Your Feelings.

Once you feel ready to face them, it also helps to just feel the feelings that come up with doubt. I suggest this after getting social support because these feelings can be overwhelming, but you can decide what works best for you.

Sometimes with doubt, there can be an inclination to ignore it or push it to the side. As I mentioned, these feelings can be dis-empowering and vulnerable. It can seem like they are getting in the way of our goals and the vision we have for our lives.

Even so, I have found it worthwhile to honor my feelings even when they are inconvenient and annoying. The most common way I do this is in my meditation practice where I have time and space to let the emotions rise, crescendo and fade away. Though this experience is often intense and unpleasant, I find that allowing them as they are inspires courage.

When I give myself a moment to feel fear, face anxiety, and wade through overwhelm, I remember that I am strong enough to hold all of these things. I also remember that none of these emotions last forever and that I can find calm, stability, and kindness again. Once I experience them and let them deliver whatever message they have for me, I can move on with my life.

Return to Your Place of Strength.

Another benefit of feeling emotions, even the tough ones, is that they help to clarify what matters most. As someone with anxiety, feelings of fear are common for me. I used to be afraid of these feelings until I finally flipped them on their head.

One magical day, I realized that a lot of my fear and anxiety was a confused way of expressing deep longing. I was often afraid of being alone or being judged, which signified my desire for connection. I was regularly anxious about making a mistake, which revealed my deep desire to produce good in the world and avoid harming others.

When I was able to feel the fear, I could finally see what was hiding beneath it. The things hiding there were my deepest values and the things I wanted most in life. These things didn’t make the fear and doubt go away, but they made my struggle worth it.

In other words, when doubt comes up, the answer isn’t to banish it away. The answer is not to pretend that it isn’t there. Instead, it works better to acknowledge that risk is inherent to life and connect with the values that make the risk feel worthwhile.

By reconnecting with our values and deep aspirations, we can find strength, motivation, and courage even in the face of doubt.

Picture of post author, mindfulness teacher, and lawyer Claire E. Parsons with quote "When I was able to feel the doubt, I could finally see what was hiding beneath it. The things hiding there were my deepest values and what I wanted most in life. This didn't make the fear and doubt go away, but they made my struggle worth it."

Doubt Is Challenging But Mindfulness Can Help You Face It.

Doubt is a common affliction for many lawyers and professionals, but it does not have to be something that holds you back. With mindfulness and self-compassion, you can learn how to recognize and care for yourself in the face of doubt. Doing so takes time, patience, and is best with social support. The good news is that it may also help you harness the strength, confidence, and motivation you need to keep pursuing goals and building the life you want.

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Why Lawyers Should Prioritize Joy and Practices to Help Them Start

I admit it. The word “joy” used to make me cringe a little bit inside. For a while, it was plastered on the walls of so many homes along with signs reading “Live. Laugh. Love.” and showed up in the titles of countless self-help books.

The frequency with which I saw that term used, often inaccurately, gave me the distinct and bizarre impression that “joy” was somehow omnipresent, yet also mythical and unattainable. After all, how could conflict, unhappiness, and social problems be so prevalent when everyone seemed hellbent on praising joy?

Don’t Let the Misuse of the Word Fool You. Joy Is Powerful.

More recently, though, I have come around to the “joy” camp. The transition had nothing to do with all those signs and books. Instead, it happened when I started to study suffering and the response to it. When I learned about compassion practices and saw their impact in my life, I realized something I had previously overlooked: joy is powerful.

The overuse of the word had made joy seem frivolous and meaningless, but when I feel it—especially in response to suffering—it is nothing short of magic. Joy has a potential to connect us in good times and to bind us, to ourselves and others, in hard times.

Image of celebrating professionals with quote that says "Joy has the potential to connect us in good times and to bind us, to ourselves and others, in hard times."

Joy Is More than an Emotion.

Many of us may think that joy is an emotion that simply arises without warning and lasts only a moment. This is true but also incomplete. We can cultivate joy and in so doing, cultivate compassion and a greater sense of well-being. For many of us, joy may seem like a temporary and elusive state because we aren’t accustomed to staying present with the experience of strong emotions.

Regardless of the type, emotions are sensory experiences in the body. Even positive emotions like joy can feel uncomfortable, if not overwhelming, so we may unconsciously register them as stress that induces a mental flight reaction. For this reason, many of us may need to learn to sit with and savor even positive emotions.

Joy Can Be a Practice and Meditation Can Help.

This is just one of the reasons why meditation practice can be so powerful, because it may provide a rare opportunity to experience emotions in the body.

Whether in meditation or otherwise, sensing emotions as they are cultivates a capacity to accept the true and full experience of life. This can mean greater courage to accept the hard parts of life, as well as welcoming in those joyful emotions that provide a respite from our struggles and energize us to keep going.

As a result, savoring the good aspects of life and taking the time to celebrate can be some of the most powerful things that lawyers can do to improve our mental health for the long-term.

Image with quote from post that says: Savoring the good aspects of life and taking the time to celebrate can be some of the most powerful things that lawyers can do to improve our mental health for the long-term."

Why Lawyers Should Learn to Savor Joy.

Despite this, many lawyers and other professionals may worry that savoring victories and positive experiences may lead to resting on one’s laurels, apathy, or cause a reduction in drive. Leading self-compassion researcher, Kristin Neff, has found that, while this is a common fear, it isn’t true.

Self-compassion is not an impediment to a good work ethic; it is positively correlated with attainment of goals. Far from causing people to lack ambition, self-compassion practices, including savoring joy, result in higher motivation, more courage in taking risks, and increased stamina to persist through difficulty.

Simple Ways to Savor Joy.

Some simple ways to savor joy in life are to remind yourself to mentally “check in” during a good time. Notice what you hear, feel, taste, smell, and see and notice what that experience causes you to feel in your body. For instance, if you are playing with your kids, hear them laugh, see them smile, and notice what reaction those things elicit in you.

You can also be on the lookout for joy in your daily activities. One of my favorite savoring activities is to watch the kids run to the parents at daycare pickup time. Watching their love and excitement turns what might have been wasted time into a joy break for myself and it prepares me to greet my own kids with love.

Image showing that self-compassion practices, including savoring joy, are linked to increased motivation,courage, and persistence,

Lawyers Can Even Savor and Share Joy at Work.

In the work setting, one simple way to savor experiences is to acknowledge a win and congratulate your team. When the praise is directed to you, you could practice savoring joy by learning to simply say “thank you” when you receive a compliment and allowing the warm feelings just wash over you, instead of deflecting or talking to hide your embarrassment. If you struggle with paying or giving compliments, a simpler place is to establish a habit of internally congratulating yourself for a job well done.

For example, after a difficult deposition, you might reflect on how you handled yourself and appreciate the discipline, organization, and restraint you showed in hard circumstances. These practices generally don’t take much time, but research suggests that the cumulative effect over time can yield major benefits for your motivation, outlook, stamina, and capacity to handle difficult moments.

Prioritizing Joy Makes Life Better.

So, does this mean that I am telling you to go put a big “joy” sign on your wall? Not quite, unless hanging a sign like that reminds you to cultivate joy in your own life. The object here isn’t the performance of joy or convincing others that you feel joyful. Instead, the power of joy comes in when we fully experience it and prioritize it in our lives.

Because when we open to joy, in all its overwhelming glory, we’ll find courage, energy, and strength care for our families and ourselves, serve clients, and make more joy for the rest of the world. So, I don’t care if you put a big “joy” sign on your wall, as a long as you make space for it in your heart.

Image with quote: "The power of joy comes in when we fully experience it and prioritize it in our lives."

Here’s a Guided Meditation to Help Lawyers Practice Joy

If you want to experience the power of practicing joy for yourself, check out this new guided meditation. This ten-minute guided meditation walks lawyers (and anyone else who wants to try it) through the process of noting and experiencing joy in the body. The first reason to do this practice is that joy feels good. It may be a great way to rest and relax.

In addition, though, lawyers may find this practice beneficial for other reasons. First, as a practice that trains sustained attention in a directed way, it is a practice that cultivates mindfulness. Second, the practice is also likely to cultivate wisdom. It’s hard to do this practice and not have insights about what causes joy for you, so you can get more of it in your life.

You can check out the meditation here or find it on my YouTube channel:

Are There Other Ways for Lawyers to Practice Joy in Meditation?

The answer to this is a definite “yes.” The direct experience of joy in the practice shared above is one way to cultivate it. Other options include:

Embedding a joy practice into your normal meditation session as offered in this guided practice;
Practicing and reflecting on gratitude;
Cultivating mudita or appreciative joy for other people. This may sound weird but the best way to increase your odds of happiness is to learn to feel happy for others.
Practicing joy by showing it on your face with this smile meditation.

There are so many ways for lawyers to bring more joy into life and meditation. Try them all out to see which one you enjoy the most.

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Five Reasons to Stop Judging Yourself for Using Guided Meditations

Image of woman meditating with headphones on in a living room with title of post "Five Reasons to Stop Judging Yourself for Using Guided Meditations"

When I speak to lawyers about mindfulness, I’m sometimes asked about guided meditations. I’m not sure why, but some people have the idea that using guided meditation is somehow not “real” meditation. Allow me to set the record straight: that’s not true.

At least, I don’t think it’s true. Don’t get me wrong. There are advantages to meditating without guiding. I have written about that before. But the fact that unguided meditation offers benefits does not imply that guided meditation is somehow not enough.

If you are giving yourself a hard time about this, keep reading. Here are five reasons why guided meditation is a valid way for lawyers to practice meditation.

1. Guided Meditations Can Help You Explore and Learn Various Practices

I don’t rely on guiding too much in my personal practice anymore, but as a beginner I used them as much as I could. The reason for this was that I did not have very much experience with different practices. And even when I found practices that I loved, like loving-kindness, I hadn’t memorized all of the steps.

After a few years, that changed but only because I had used been practicing so much in recorded mindfulness sessions. That’s my point here.

Guided meditations can help lawyers explore and learn various meditation practices. While I do recommend a simple approach to meditation in general, exploration is great for lawyers too.

Mindfulness is a trait and a tool for life. The best way to figure out what styles and practices support you the most is to experience them. Guided meditations offer this to lawyers and other professionals who want to learn.

2. They Can Help You Keep Your Session on Schedule

One of the biggest issues that prevent lawyers from meditating more is time. A great thing about most guided meditations is that they have built-in timers. Most recorded practices cue you when you are done, so you don’t overstay your session.

This is a real issue with meditation because it is a practice that can encourage spacing out or falling asleep. Because most lawyers access guiding in the form of audio recordings, the end of the practice will usually wake you up.

Some apps, including Peloton, also allow you to put your practice on your calendar. You can select your practices for the week and schedule them so you don’t miss a sit. This is huge for lawyers, who are often motivated by our calendars.

Image of person meditating with headphones on listing 5 Reasons Why Guided Meditations Are Great for Lawyers as discussed in the post

3. Guided Meditations Can Make Practice More Enjoyable

The best kind of meditation is the one that you will do consistently. Based on this, it makes sense to enjoy your time meditating at least a little bit.

Guided meditations can do this in several ways. They may offer background music or soundscapes that can block out distracting sounds. This is important if you live in a noisy part of town or with people or pets who don’t always keep quiet.

The voice of another person guiding you make make practice feel less lonely. Along the same lines, the voice of another person may be soothing and help you relax. If you use meditations from someone you know and trust, following their guiding may help you feel more confident in your practice.

This may help you rest in your practice instead of feeling like you are working too hard. Meditation is hard enough on its own. Using guiding to make it a bit easier is not a cop out. It can be a smart way for lawyers to sustain their practice.

4. Lawyers May Need Practice Accepting Support

If you don’t like the idea of guiding in meditation, it could be possible that you have some issues around accepting help. This is common for many lawyers and it was definitely an issue for me.

The good news, though, is that you can learn to work out of this mindset. Independence is a wonderful virtue. If you are exploring mindfulness, though, I bet you already have this trait. Meditation will not take it away, but it may help you see the various ways in which you do better when you have the right support.

A guided meditation is a tool to support mindfulness practice. It works just like a mat, block, and blanket support a yoga practice. If you use props for yoga or another physical fitness practice, you are likely to see that they don’t detract from practice. Instead, they often make practice better.

Trust me, learning this lesson in meditation is one that translates into life. This is yet another reason why lawyers can feel good about using guiding to support their mindfulness practice.

Image of man meditating outside in headphones with social media post that says "Lawyers, avoid coming up with reasons why your mindfulness practice is not good enough. Using a guided meditation is real meditation."

5. Trained Teachers Offer Guided Meditations for a Reason

As a final attempt to convince you that there is nothing wrong with supporting your practice with guiding, I will appeal to authority. If you take a meditation course or attend a retreat, you are very unlikely to practice in silence on your own the entire time. Instead, most teachers offer some sort of guided meditation.

If you search the internet, you will easily find guided meditations from some of the best meditation teachers in the world. This includes people like Sharon Salzberg, Tara Brach, Jack Kornfield, Thich Nhat Hahn, Pema Chodron, Ethan Nichtern, and more.

Along the same lines, I offer several guided meditations for lawyers on this blog. And I guide virtual sessions for lawyers with the Mindfulness in Law Society at least once a month.

Trained teachers offer these practices because they encourage students to practice and learn. Implicit in this is the idea that using guided meditations is still meditation.

Bottom Line: There Is Nothing Wrong with Using a Guided Meditation

If you are taking the time to practice mindfulness, please do not be hard on yourself. Be wary against listing all the reasons why your practice is not good enough. Practice is hard enough, especially for busy people like lawyers.

As long as the guiding is helping you practice, there’s nothing wrong with it. Just keep practicing and doing what works for you. You can always explore other styles of practice over time if needed, but you shouldn’t feel pressure to do so. Using guided meditations is a legitimate way for lawyers and everyone else to practice mindfulness.

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Laughing Through Meditation: Lessons from Josh Johnson

I have always been a big fan of stand-up comedy and recently this world has collided with my love of mindfulness. It’s now becoming common for comics to talk about meditation in their sets. Most of the time, I can turn my meditation teacher brain off for long enough to get a good laugh out of them.

But when one of my favorite comics, Josh Johnson, took on meditation I couldn’t resist writing about it. I’m a huge fan of Josh Johnson. I’ve seen his tour, watched his comedy special on HBO, and love his appearances on the Daily Show. Johnson is an excellent storyteller and can make you laugh at the tiniest things.

Recently, my husband sent me one of Johnson’s short clips where he talks about trying meditation. It’s quick and hilarious. You should watch it just to laugh. The other good news is that Johnson’s bit points to several very real struggles in meditation practice.

For those of you who want to laugh and learn, this post walks through Josh Johnson’s two-minute clip on meditation. Then it offers teachings to address the problems he mentions.

Don’t Beat Yourself Up When Your Mind Wanders in Meditation

Johnson starts off his bit by correctly mentioning the teaching that you should avoid beating yourself up when your mind wanders from the breath. Of course, he exaggerates the teaching for comic effect. He says that “you should not, you cannot” beat yourself up when your mind wanders.

In reality, this teaching is offered because it is common for people to berate themselves when their minds wander in meditation. It happens to all of us. For this reason, the teaching is not a prohibition like Johnson implies. Rather, it is a guidepost and an invitation to learn self-compassion.

Stated in a more precise way, the teaching really is that meditation is much easier and more effective when you have a kind inner attitude. If you notice yourself getting upset or engaging self-criticism, that’s okay. There is no need to feel like a failure or criticize that. Instead, the answer is just to recognize that you are doing something hard and go back to the breath.

Image with quote that says "meditation pro tips: don't try too hard. Don't expect a clear mind."

Don’t Expect to Have a “Calm Mind”

About 25 seconds into the clip, Johnson correctly describes the practice of bringing one’s attention back to the breath repeatedly during meditation. But he ends it by saying that the goal or the expected end result is a “calm mind.”

Johnson is doing comedy here, so he doesn’t explain what he means by a “calm mind.” If you watch on, though, you can tell that he is equating a calm mind to a clear mind. Stated more directly, this means a non-thinking mind.

In fact, this is not necessarily the goal of meditation.

Some traditions may make this the goal and some teachers even talk about “clear minds” on occasion. For many teachers and traditions (myself included), though, meditation is not about removing thoughts. It does not make thoughts magically disappear and they are not off limits during practice.

Instead, the goal is making peace with thoughts, getting clarity about them, and creating wisdom around them.

Don’t Try Too Hard When You Meditate

With this foundation laid, Johnson dramatically declares that he’s “Going to try to meditate.” He closes his eyes and assumes a stern posture to show how serious he is about it.

Again, this is clearly for comic effect. Even so, it raises a really important point. Johnson is suggesting that good meditation is about being super serious. He’s suggesting that it’s fundamentally about discipline.

If you watch, pause the clip at about 37 seconds and take a look at it. You can see Johnson sitting with his eyes closed tight, appearing like he is trying to force himself to concentrate. Aside from the comic value, this is how a lot of lawyers think meditation is supposed to look.

As I have written before, relaxation, play, and even joy are better approaches. Why? Because you will focus best and learn the most when you are relaxed instead of trying too hard. Discipline matters insofar as you do the practice. But, once you do, ease up, relax, and crack a smile.

Image with quote about meditation that says "Focusing on the breath is not the same as thinking about the breath."

Lotus Pose Is Not Required in Meditation

Next, Johnson attempts the hilarious and impressive feat of demonstrating getting himself into lotus pose while sitting on a stool. This is for laughs and to show how awkward he felt forcing himself this pose for meditation.

Johnson quickly notes, though, that he struggles because he’s not as flexible as he used to be. Then he says his leg fell asleep. Anyone who has meditated for even a few minutes has had these same struggles.

Here’s the truth: meditation can happen in almost any posture. Using a cushion or sitting with legs crossed can be great, but they aren’t required. You can meditate in a chair or you can do so standing or lying down or even walking. Any posture works as long as you feel safe, relaxed, supported, and can stay alert.

In addition, you are allowed to move when you meditate. If your leg falls asleep, the classic teaching is to just notice it. But if it is distracting or uncomfortable enough to really bother you, you are allowed to move. It’s truly okay.

Focusing on the Breath Is Not Thinking about the Breath

Johnson next hilariously showcases a subtle misunderstanding of the directions for breath focus practice. Once he gets himself into position, he says that the object is to “just think about your breath.” He exaggerates this by saying you should “hold onto the ideas of your breath; that’s how you stay present!”

Some teachers and traditions may differ on this, but meditation is not thinking about the breath. Instead, breath focus meditation is about keeping one’s attention with the breath. I teach this to mean feeling the physical sensations of the breath. Other ways of practice also include noting the cycles or parts of the breath.

Thinking about the breath is different than feeling the breath and observing its aspects. When you think about the breath, your awareness is principally in the mind. But when you feel sensations of the breath, your awareness is in the body.

As Johnson comically demonstrates, this distinction matters a lot. All of his thinking about the breath leads inevitably to a long train of thoughts about everything but his breath. This is why it makes a difference to know what your anchor is in meditation. If you know the anchor very precisely, it is easier to stay with and return to your anchor.

Image with quote that says "You probably aren’t doing meditation wrong. The practice is hard. Struggles may be signs you are doing it right. You just might need some support."

What to Do When You See that Your Mind Wandered

Perhaps the funniest part of the clip is when Johnson demonstrates his wandering mind. He goes off on a tangent for about a minute sharing his anxiety about world events. As you can hear, the audience immediately gets it. This is a very relatable thing.

Mind wandering is exactly what you can expect to experience if you try meditation. When you start to notice it, it can be just as hilarious as the mental rant Johnson shared in his clip.

And he announces in dramatic form at the two-minute mark of the clip, “I wandered.” Of course, this is a comedic reckoning. Johnson uses it to show that his pursuit of a calm mind was futile all along and to laugh at himself.

Here’s the thing: the moment where you notice the mind wandering is not a failure. It doesn’t mean you are doing the practice wrong. It means you are doing the practice right because you have seen that your mind is wandering.

In that moment, Johnson woke up from his anxious mental rant. He stopped it. That’s a good thing and a powerful thing once it becomes a trait. The problem was, he didn’t stay with the practice and return to his breath. He judged (in hilarious fashion) the mental pattern. The teaching, of course, is just being kind and going back to the breath.

You Probably Aren’t Doing Meditation Wrong

Of course, Johnson doesn’t do that, at least not in the clip. Instead, he says that “I went ahead and I stopped meditating.” Over the laughter of the audience, he explains that he at least stopped for the time being “Because I was doing it wrong.”

As mentioned above, I think Johnson should give himself more credit. For one thing, his joke make me and lots of other people laugh. In addition, I think he was doing meditation just fine. I don’t think he was truly doing the practice wrong. Instead, as mentioned above, he may have had some expectations about practice that made him think he was doing it wrong.

In addition, the truth is that meditation is not an easy practice to sustain. It’s a simple practice to learn, but it can be hard to sustain. This is because it forces us to confront uncomfortable thoughts and sensations for extended periods of time. For these reasons, struggles in meditation don’t mean you are doing it wrong or it doesn’t work. Struggles can sometimes indicate the opposite.

You Can Always Try Again Later

Johnson says he may try meditation again in the future. Of course, trying again is the only way to learn the practice and see what works best for you.

Because all the struggles Johnson pointed to are common issues, here are a few tips that may make meditation practice a bit easier if you ever decide to start or start again:

Start small;
Make your practice enjoyable;
Find a community;
Find a teacher; and
Consider finding some resources or taking a course.

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Can Lawyers Be Convinced that Laziness Does Not Exist?

You can’t ignore a book with a title like Laziness Does Not Exist. It’s bold. Many lawyers might argue that it’s controversial. As soon as I heard it, I knew I had to read it.

Most of you probably aren’t surprised that a mindfulness teacher was interested in a book about laziness. After all, I encourage other lawyers to spend more time doing nothing in this blog on a weekly basis.

But, of course, idleness is not something we lawyers take to easily. As I will share in this review, I loved Laziness Does Not Exist (“LDNE”) by Devon Price because it helps us unpack why we dislike and fear laziness so much. (paid link) It also offers sound practices for gradually unwinding our individual and societal issues around laziness.

Keep reading to learn more about why I liked the book so much and what it may offer to you.

The Book Offers Deep Insights for Lawyers who May Fear Laziness.

Despite it’s seemingly simple title, LDNE is more than an argument about the nonexistence of laziness. Instead, it’s more of a conversation about our cultural and individual feelings about work and effort. It posits that a collection of values around work and productivity have congealed into “the laziness lie.”

These assumptions, asserting that passivity is bad and activity is good, often manipulate us all into a pattern of overwork. As a mindfulness practitioner and teacher, I was already attuned to many red flags of this nature. For instance, I understand that rest is essential and not a reward for good behavior. I have written many times before about the connection between overwork, exhaustion, and striving for perfection. And I have even talked about the idea that doing nothing can sometimes be a power move.

Even so, as I read LDNE, I was repeatedly impressed by how much Price offered deep insights on these subjects. He didn’t skim the surface by making a generic plea for us to appreciate the importance of self-care. Instead, he went deep in explaining how laziness got such a bad rap in our culture. Then he invites each of us to explore how our own fear of being regarded as lazy causes each of us to overwork, whether at work, with our personal habits, or even in our relationships.

In various ways, the book is full of insights. It reframes fundamental issues that will change your mind, whether you start off believing in laziness or not.

Image of question that asks lawyers how often do you call yourself or someone else lazy?

It Also Shares Useful Tips to Help Lawyers to Set Boundaries.

More significantly, the insights in LDNE weren’t offered just to produce “aha” moments. Instead, they are intended to help each of us give ourselves a break. LDNE does this by offering a variety of useful strategies and practices to get oneself out of the grind created by the laziness lie.

Most relevant to lawyers, these include tips and strategies for managing one’s work day and work life. For instance, it explained that small breaks at work can actually boost productivity.Th

Quite correctly, though, the tips are not just restricted to work. In this age of political polarization and upheaval, I found the chapters four and five to be the most useful. In these chapters, Price discussed the traps we can set for ourselves when we get too invested in world and political events or when we try to maximize our achievement even in our leisure time.

I found these chapters useful because I have struggled with both of these things. Despite my busy and stressful law practice, I have still found it a challenge to not take on every social cause as my personal mission. It also can be tough for lawyers to turn our competitive and goal-oriented personas from work when he get home.

This can cause us to track and document on social media every activity in our lives to the point where we leave ourselves no place to rest. It was helpful that the chapters both offered permission and practical strategies to gradually find more ease with these life activities.

A summary of the book review shared in this article of Laziness Does Not Exist by Devon Price

Encourages compassion and understanding for yourself and others

Perhaps my favorite thing about LDNE is that the overall mission of the book is one that encourages greater compassion and understanding for oneself and others. In the end, the big message that you may get from reading LDNE is that calling someone, including yourself, lazy is often the result of failing to look closely or clearly at a situation.

Price encourages us all to stop reflexively calling ourselves or others lazy when we struggle. Instead, he asks us to look more closely to understand what may be causing the problem. In many situations doing so may help us identify a very logical reason why effort, work, and motivation are a challenge.

But I also appreciated that LDNE also addressed the reality that many of us, especially lawyers, tend to criticize ourselves more than anyone else for alleged laziness. Though I would not call LDNE a self-help book, it does offer some helpful strategies in this regard. It wisely discussed the value of meditation, simply feeling one’s feelings, and even writing about one’s experiences as helpful ways of confronting our own personal hang-ups and self-judgments when it comes to laziness.

Laziness Does Not Exist Is a Good Read for Lawyers

Overall, Laziness Does Not Exist by Devon Price is an easy to read, insightful, and well-structured book that will change your mind. It will help you identify the ways that worries about laziness come up in your own life and work. It may help you develop strategies to work a little less in ways that aren’t consistent with your values. But the end goal isn’t lazy at all. It is courage to look more clearly at the world, yourself, and other people so that you can act with greater kindness and compassion.

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Upcoming Lawyer Events for Mindfulness and Compassion

I’m relaxing on family vacation this week, but I realized I have two great events coming up next week. Lawyers interested in mindfulness and attorney well-being may like to hear about them. In fact, both events are raising money for good causes so I hope you will check them out.

This post will share details about each of the events and provide the details for how lawyers can register and participate.

Will Work for Food

The first event coming up next week ticks all the boxes. It covers an interesting topic, it’s aimed lawyers, and it is for a good cause. Will Work for Food – the New Possibilities Hour is an initiative of my friend, Jean Lawler and other dispute resolution professionals. Jean is a great lawyer but she spends much of her time mediating cases now.

She started Will Work for Food with friends to educate people about the mediation process and raise money for charity in the process. To do this, she brings in experts from various fields to talk and teach about an issue that comes up in mediation.

The Topic: Anger in Conflict Resolution

Jean and her friends saw my past working and writing on anger management and asked me to talk about that. Anger is definitely something that can get in the way at mediation. For that reason, Jean and I will talk about how mindfulness can help us manage it and even harness the energy of anger for good.

This session will be an interview about anger, and how it shows up in law practice and conflict resolution. We’ll also discuss what mindfulness offers in terms of anger management and why it’s a whole lot more than a few breathing strategies. Instead, you might be surprised to learn that anger may have some hidden benefits.

Why Lawyers Should Watch

It is free to watch and participate in this session, but Will Work for Food encourages everyone watching to donate to food banks. As a big fan of cooking myself, I elected to support the humanitarian work of renowned Chef, Jose Andres, at World Central Kitchen.

I like World Central Kitchen because it sends food and volunteers to where it is needed most urgently around the world. WCK goes to locations hit by natural disasters, war and conflict, and even disease.

Of course, my episode will only be a drop in the bucket in addressing hunger on a worldwide basis. But Will Work for Food has already raised over $1 Million since it started in 2020. Join us to be a part of that impact.

When and How Lawyers Can Join or Watch

The live event is online on June 25th at 8 AM PST / 11 PM EST. You can find register for the event on Zoom or watch live on LinkedIn. If you join live, you can engage and ask questions in the comments or chat.

If you wish to catch the interview later, you can find the recording on LinkedIn or view it on the Will Work for Food website.

Thriving in Law Summit

This Summit is organized by lawyer and coach, Gina Steele. It is a 4-day Virtual Online Event designed specifically for legal professionals looking to transform their practice and their lives. Have you ever looked at a conference schedule that looked great but you didn’t have the time to attend?

This event is different. It boasts an array of wonderful speakers on a range of topics relating to lawyer well-being. But it gives you the flexibility to decide when and how to watch. Topics include mindfulness, compasion, communication, time management, and more.

The Topic: Compassion for Lawyers

My session is entitled “Becoming a Badass Lawyer: How Self-Compassion and Compassion Towards Others Helps Lawyers Succeed and Thrive.” In this one-hour interview, Gina asks me to break down how and why lawyers should cultivate compassion for self and others.

We discuss the impediments to compassion that are inherent to law practice, but also strategies and practices for removing those blockages. I also share studies and stories that help lawyers see that greater compassion and less stress are real possibilities for them.

Why Lawyers Should Register

This Summit is intended for lawyers who want to:

energize their law practice;
learn new ways to manage stress;
optimize their workday; and
be inspired.

Like the event above, the Thriving in Law Sumit is also supporting a good cause. Our society faces a critical gap in access to justice. For many underserved and marginalized communities, competent legal representation is out of reach. Lincoln Law School is working to close this gap by transforming determined, hardworking adults into practice-ready, ethical advocates. Those who donate to Lincoln Law School will have access to the Summit videos for a year.

When and How Lawyers Can Watch

The Summit runs from June 25-28, 2026. Each day, all scheduled interviews will be available at 9:00 am PDT/12:00 pm EDT and will remain available until the end of day June 30, 2026. You can register through Gina’s website here and get access to all the videos next week.

This means that you can watch the videos on your own time in a way that fits your schedule.

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Easy Celebration Tips for Busy Lawyers

I teach and write about the importance of celebration for lawyers, all the time. But I’ll be honest, it can sometimes be hard to do. Last week, I finished a critical case and I was fortunate to have the chance to celebrate right away. It made a huge difference in my outlook and energy levels.

This experience reminded me how simple but essential celebration can be for lawyers. As a result, I decided to share my experience to show that celebration doesn’t have to be something that is time-consuming, expensive, or difficult. Instead, it can be a simple sharing of experience with colleagues.

If, like me, you struggle to celebrate all your achievements, to keep yourself motivated in your law practice. This post will identify why celebration is essential for lawyers and the key ingredients of a good celebration.

Why Is Celebration Important for Lawyers?

The reason that celebration is important for lawyers is the same reason that it is hard for us to do. Lawyers are busy people who deal with difficult things. Our work involves risky situations, stressful cases with clients, and a lot of time in the office. We may also feel pressure because so many other people depend on us.

So when a case ends or a deal is done, lawyers can forget to take the time to feel good about it. We may move on to the next case or just go home and rest, but we don’t look back. Instead, lawyers often keep looking forward.

Over time, this can mean that lawyers experience a lot of negative things without much balance. We devote our attention and energy to things that stress us out. But we may miss many of the good things that come along the way.

Celebration is essential to remind us that there are also good parts of law practice. We may have clients that we care about, people in our law firms that we enjoy, and staff and the team members who impress us. If we don’t take the time to celebrate, we don’t reap the rewards of all these beneficial aspects of work. Due to the negativity bias in the brain, lawyers need explicit reminders of good things like these.

What Was My Big Celebration?

You may be wondering what my big celebration was. In reality, it wasn’t that big at all. My practice group has weekly conference calls, where we all meet on Teams to discuss our cases and workload. Because it was the end of our busy season, one of the practice group leaders decided that we should all share a drink. Some of us chose to drink mocktails, and some of us actually had a cocktail.

Fortunately, the day of the event, the leaders sent out an email reminding us of the special occasion for this call. A few hours before it happened, I resolved a major case that had caused problems and stress for my practice and client. So of course, I decided to rush out and buy some champagne to celebrate with my colleagues on the call. And let me just say, it was a lot of fun. It made me feel good about my practice and close to my team. It made me realize that the struggles we go through as lawyers are worth it. It really made a difference to my energy levels and outlook.

Image with quote that says "Celebration is essential for lawyers for the same reason it is hard for us."

The Key Ingredients of the Celebration

You may be wondering what made this simple celebration so great? The key ingredients I have identified are as follows:

first, it was planned in advance,
second, it involved a shared experience, and
third, it included an element of fun
fourth, it did not require extra work.

These items are easy to comprehend but I will explain why each was so essential me and why it may matter to other lawyers.

1. Lawyers May Need to Plan to Celebrate

The first element, planning, matters because it shows it was a priority. Planning is also a practical necessity, so we could make a point to be there and participate. In addition, we were reminded of the event the day of, so we didn’t forget to do something special. This reminded everyone that celebration and connection with each other were important.

I know sometimes it feels odd to plan out a celebration or even a small time to connect with colleagues. While impromptu gatherings can be nice, it is not something that busy lawyers can rely on. Instead, people with busy calendars need a plan. If you prioritize celebration, show you value it by planning it out.

2. Celebration Requires a Shared Experience

The second element, the shared experience, is of course the most essential. Even though it is non-billable time, most of my team make the time to come to our practice group meetings. This is in part because we like to talk to each other and hear from each other. We work in separate offices across a few states and don’t always get to see each other face-to-face.

All of us can celebrate victories and wins and getting through difficult times by ourselves. Doing so in the practice group meeting meant we got to do it together, and that made it better. As much as lawyers are around people every day, let’s not forget that loneliness and isolation are common for us.

For this reason, any chance to bring lawyers together for real community is a good thing. This is why a shared experience is essential to celebration.

Image listing 4 essential ingredients of celebration for lawyers shared in the article

3. Celebration Should Be Fun

The third element, fun, should also not be overlooked. Fun had to be added in this situation, because if it wasn’t, it would just be another practice group call. If we didn’t add something fun, it wouldn’t be special. It would be another work meeting and not a celebration. In this case, the drink made the call more fun and took it in the realm of celebration.

I have written about alcohol before, and so we had to make sure that the cocktail element didn’t overshadow the intent. For this reason, I was glad the group did not put pressure on anyone to participate in a way that was not fun for them. The leaders in my group did this by telling everyone the could bring a cocktail or mocktail as their drink.

Regardless of whether their drink contained alcohol, everyone had fun with their drinks. Some even came up with creative names for their drinks or used a special glass. I decided to add a personal charcuterie board to my champagne. Everyone had a good time explaining whatever they chose to drink.

The point here is that celebration needs to be fun. Do something a little different or special to note the occasion and lighten the mood and it can turn a meeting into a celebration.

4. Lawyers Don’t Have Time for Extra Work

The fourth element: it did not require extra work. No one had to prepare anything or make time for an extra meeting on their calendar. Instead, we used the time already available and just decided to dedicate some of it to celebration. This increased the chances that we could all participate and really celebrate the occasion.

Sometimes law firms and companies get into trouble because they try to do celebratory events, which require a lot of work from their employees. Sometimes this effort is worth it, and sometimes it is not. When you’re planning celebrations at your office, be sure that it isn’t forced fun. Make it real fun that doesn’t require too much work or force participation at the detriment of the people who will enjoy it.

Celebration Should Be a Habit for Lawyers Instead of a Rarity

Here is my big point with this post. I shared this simple experience about a celebration for at work to show how simple it can be. Sometimes lawyers don’t celebrate because we think we’re too busy, and we think we don’t have the energy. This post shares an example of a way to celebrate with other lawyers in the office that doesn’t take extra time or extra work.

Of course, lawyers may not be able to celebrate every tiny thing or do it every day. But if we keep these tips in mind, we can make celebration a regular occurrence in our places of work and lives. And the more we make connection, happiness, joy a priority, the happier and healthier we may become.

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