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Mindfulness and Your Top 5 Mental Patterns Revealed

Even if you aren’t a Spotify user, you probably heard about the Wrapped year-end reviews last week. Wrapped is a feature that summarizes the year in audio for Spotify users. It lists your top artists, top songs, and this year even provides a listening age.

As I heard friends and contacts share stories about this, I couldn’t help but wonder what it would be like if our minds had a similar feature. What would it be like if, each year, we got a list of our top 5 mental patterns?

What If You Got a Yearly Report of Your Mental Patterns?

What if our minds generated some kind of fun video for us to watch and play back our inner audio over the past year? I can’t decide if I would want to watch this video or not. When it comes to music, it can be fun to reflect on the albums and songs that made your year. Thoughts and emotions, though, can be another matter.

In truth, learning about your mental patterns and repetitious thoughts is one of the principal benefits of mindfulness practice. Once you practice meditation enough, you can generate your own mental version of the Spotify Wrapped.

Mindfulness Can Help You Identify Your Top 5 Mental Patterns

Mindfulness practice may help you learn what your top 5 mental tendencies are. For instance, after more than 10 years of meditation, I know that my top 5 usually includes: (1) planning; (2) worrying; (3) wondering; (4) spacing out; and (5) writing. Seriously, my mind is often writing when I meditate whether I am trying to write something or not.

You start to catch repetitious nasty internal phrases. Again, mine include: (1) you aren’t good at this; (2) you will fail; (3) nobody likes you; (4) I’m so embarrassed; and (5) why doesn’t everyone recognize how amazing I am?

Meditation may even help you learn that emotional reactions are part of larger patterns. All my years meditating have helped me see that my top 5 challenging emotions are: (1) anxiety; (2) fear; (3) doubt; (4) anger (that’s hiding anxiety); and (5) loneliness/alienation.

On the flip side, mindfulness practices also helped me see that my top 5 positive emotions are: (1) generosity; (2) humor; (3) compassion; (4) courage; and (5) creativity. This means that sometimes meditation can help us see and embrace our wholesome qualities.

Image listing an example of top 5 mental patterns revealed by mindfulness practice as shared in the blog post

Seeing the Mental Patterns Is Hard but Worthwhile

Unlike the Spotify Wrapped, which usually may be fun or at least funny to see, reckoning with these inner mental and emotional patterns can more of a gut check. Even so, it is worth it because awareness that something has become a pattern provides important information.

1. You Can Take Them Less Personally.

First, seeing your patterns with mindfulness helps you to take things less personally. In the moment, our thoughts and feelings can seem to be really big and important. Mindfulness practice helps you see these incidents as part of a pattern. This helps you zoom out in terms of perspective. You can see an incident as a data point and watch for where your reaction leads instead of being mired in all the messy details.

2. You See How You Can Change the Pattern.

Second, this broader perspective produced in meditation can create the clarity needed to change the pattern. As I have written before, it is exceptionally hard to change habits and patterns. Yet, one of the things that can help us do so is by taking a good clear look at where they lead. Mindfulness can help us see this and it gives us the opportunity to take the steps to make a change.

3. You Gain Motivation to Change the Pattern.

Finally, seeing the reaction or behavior as a pattern helps you appreciate its impact. As I mentioned, changing habits is hard work. It takes discipline and thoughtfulness and a whole lot of self-compassion. In many cases, it can feel daunting even to try to make a change. But, when you see that something is part of a pattern, you can see that it’s not just a singular incident.

In this way, you can see the connection between your singular reaction and the broader state of your life. You can see how your behavior today leads to the circumstances you will face tomorrow and potentially for months and years to come.

Mindfulness Can Help You See Patterns and Change Your Life

As I shared above, I have always struggled with fear and anxiety. It arose in nearly every situation for me. To be honest, it still arises in many situations today. Mindfulness practice helped me see that my anxiety was not just the product of my immediate conditions, but was instead part of a bigger pattern.

Once I saw this, I was in a position to see how much anxiety detracted from my life and kept me from the things I wanted. This was a painful acknowledgement, but it is what motivated me, in very slow and small steps, to change.

For this reason, it is understandable why we all love to hear about our top song, artist, and album lists at the end of the year. Reflecting on our patterns can be a fun thing to do in the case of our music and media choices. It can remind us of the songs that made our years great or helped us cope with a challenging year.

Image that asks the sort of scary question "what would your top 5 mental patterns of the year be?"

At the Year End, Consider Noting Your Top 5 Mental Patterns Too

In the case our minds, taking stock of our patterns can be an interesting exercise too. When it comes to mental patterns and inner reactions, though, seeing things clearly can be a bit more complex. Unlike the Spotify Wrapped, noting the top thoughts or patterns that consume our mental energy can be a bit more challenging.

Even so, I think it is still worth it. Most of us will forget our Spotify Wrapped within a week after we see them each December. Once mindfulness practice helps you see your mental patterns, though, it is hard to forget what they are. It not only opens up new possibilities for change. It also creates a little more space for self-kindness.

At the end of the year, while you are compiling your top lists, it may be interesting to consider your top 5 mindfulness lists too. What occupied your mind most this year? What mental patterns were the most frequent for you? What common phrases played in your mind on a loop?

I don’t promise that reflecting in this way is as fun as seeing your Spotify Wrapped, but when viewed with mindfulness and self-compassion, it may open up fresh possibilities for the new year.

Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, How to Be a Badass Lawyer, for a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.

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How Lawyers Can Use Self-Compassion for Growth

December can be hit or miss for lawyers depending on how your year was. It can be a big celebration if you had a lot of growth. But it can be a struggle if the year did not quite go as you had hoped. In both cases, self-compassion is in order.

Now, you may think it’s odd that I say self-compassion is important if you achieved your goals. If so, jump down to point 2 below. Most of us understand innately why self-compassion might help when we fail to achieve our goals.

The struggle, of course, is in remembering to use employ it. That is why I am reminding you about it here (and trying to remind myself in the process). If self-compassion is a struggle for you, know that you aren’t alone. But keep reading because this post has some tips and a good resource to help you learn more.

Lawyers Should Be Cautious about Raising the Bar

One of the reasons that I am thinking about this now is that I did not achieve all my goals this year. It was a great year for me. I achieved many of the goals I had set for myself. Sadly, I did not achieve them all and one significant personal project fell by the wayside.

When you are a high achiever, like many lawyers are, it can be really easy to expect that you will achieve all your goals. This can cause you to forget that many of our goals are challenging and subject to conditions outside of our control. What this means is that accomplishing the goals we set for ourselves is not always something we can realistically expect.

How can we reflect on the year in a way that keeps our standards high, but doesn’t continuously raise the bar to unhealthy levels?

Assess Your Growth with Self-Compassion

Self-compassion is the tool that can help us find balance here. As I have written before, self-compassion has three simple steps: (a) mindfulness; (b) common humanity; and (c) self-kindness.

Contrary to popular belief, these steps are not about being “easy” on yourself. Instead, they are about being fair to yourself. Self-compassion is about not judging yourself more harshly than you would judge someone else.

Even if you struggle with self-compassion, using the three steps in your year-end reflection can help you take a balanced and accurate view.

Step 1: Mindfully Review the Data

The first step – mindfulness – does not require meditation though that can help. Instead, mindfulness here refers to awareness. To review your year with self-compassion, you would review the data of what transpired.

To do this, you might ask questions like these:

What did you accomplish this year?
How did you use your time?
How do you feel about the year?
What happened during the year that was unexpected or out of your control?

When you ask these questions, be as objective and neutral as you can be. It may help to review your calendar and any relevant data points to ensure your reflections are based on accurate data.

Step 2: Celebrate the Victories

In a normal year, the odds are that the questions above will elicit both positive and negative recollections. Though it may be easy to do, I encourage you to not gloss over the positive parts.

One part of self-compassion that lawyers easily forget is enjoying positive things. If you achieved goals or hit milestones, by all means, celebrate them.

If you struggle to even recognize the positive things you did, as some lawyers might, you can try to reflect on these questions:

What did you do well?
What personal or professional growth did you experience?
What goals did you achieve or what habits did you make last?
What makes you proud about the last year?

This is not an exercise of selfishness or arrogance. In fact, one benefit of reflecting on achievements is that it inevitably leads to reflection of the people and supports who helped you along the way. If these arise, share your celebration by expressing gratitude or praising the people who deserve it.

Step 3: Identify the Areas of Growth

Of course, the biggest struggle for many of us is with the goals we did not achieve. These dreaded “areas of growth” can easily make us feel defeated or hopeless. As people who come to expect high performance, lawyers often don’t know how to process failure when it comes.

This is where self-compassion is really essential. Mindfulness can help us get clear about the things that did not go as we had hoped. The second step, common humanity, is what can help us stay clear and avoid judging ourselves too harshly.

To identify the areas of growth from the year, we can ask ourselves these questions:

What projects did you not get to?
On what goals did you fall short?
What problems or struggles did you encounter?
What things or experiences are missing in your life and work?

After we identify these items, the key is to remember that we are human and that most humans are imperfect. Most humans do not always achieve 100% of their goals 100% of the time. Then, instead of beating ourselves up, we might reflect on the things that were struggles for us and consider what we need to recover or move forward.

Use Self-Compassion to Set New Year Goals

As I have written before, self-compassion is not just for reflecting at the end of the year. It can also help you apply more self-kindness when you set goals for the new year.

This may help you find motivation to start strong with a new habit. It could help you learn to stop procrastinating on one of those nagging projects that you’ve avoided for too long. It can even make sometimes heart-wrenching resolutions, like checking unhealthy habits or weight loss, feel less painful.

If you are looking to set high goals or form healthier habits in the new year, don’t forget about self-kindness and honoring your human needs.

Where Lawyers Can Learn More

Image for webinar event shared in the blog post that is called "recharge your legal mind: year end reflection for growth in the new year"

If you want to learn more about this topic, you are in luck. I will be presenting a webinar for CLE credit on this subject for the Knowledge Group on December 12, 2025 at 12 PM EST. The session will be available on-demand after that date as well.

I will be speaking about Self-Compassion for End of Year Self-Reflection and Goal-Setting. Fellow lawyers and mindfulness teachers, Ron Wilcox and Alexandra Echser-Rasmussen will offer session on mindfulness practices and self-care.

If you would like to join the session, you can connect with me on LinkedIn and send me a message for a 50% off code.

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Mindfulness Techniques That Help Lawyers Break Out of Stress Cycles

Stress can build quickly in the legal profession, often trapping lawyers in exhausting cycles of overthinking, pressure, and emotional fatigue. In fact, a Reuters study found that 66% of lawyers said their time in the profession had harmed their mental health. Another 46% reported they were considering leaving entirely due to stress or burnout.

Mindfulness offers a practical, accessible way to interrupt those patterns. Grounding the mind, easing tension, and finding brief moments of clarity help lawyers break free from reactive stress loops. These practices help them reconnect with their work from a place of balance and control.

In this article, we’ll explore simple mindfulness techniques that support this shift.

Recognizing Stress Triggers Before They Spiral

Recognizing stress triggers early is one of the most powerful ways lawyers can stop stress cycles before they take over. Mindfulness helps by bringing attention to the first signs of tension. It also highlights the subtle moments when the body or mind signals that something is off.

The Mayo Clinic suggests starting by identifying what reliably causes your stress. What makes you feel tense, irritated, or suddenly overwhelmed? Do you notice headaches or stomach discomfort without a clear medical cause? Is your focus slipping or your sleep disrupted?

By observing these cues with curiosity instead of judgment, lawyers can catch stress at its earliest stages. They can then take mindful action before it spirals into a full cycle of pressure and reactivity.

Grounding Techniques That Instantly Calm the Nervous System

Grounding techniques help the nervous system settle quickly by directing attention away from spiraling thoughts and back into the present moment.

One simple option is slow, intentional breathing where you inhale deeply, pause briefly, and then exhale longer than you inhaled. This signals the body to relax and reduces the intensity of stress. Another method is physical grounding, like placing your feet on the floor or pressing your palms together.

The Cleveland Clinic also recommends the 3-3-3 technique, which means noticing three things you can see, hear, and touch. It may be a tree outside the window, a book on your shelf, or a photo on your desk. Pay attention to colors, textures, and small details. Then repeat the process for sounds and physical sensations.

These practices create an immediate feeling of steadiness and help lawyers regain control during high-pressure moments.

Mindful Reflection Practices for Long-Term Stress Reduction

Mindful reflection helps lawyers break long-term stress patterns by creating space to understand what truly affects their well-being. Simple practices such as journaling, a mindful review of the day, or intentional decompression routines create space to slow down. They also help you notice what triggered stress and how you responded.

Approaching these reflections with curiosity rather than judgment builds resilience and prevents the same stressful cycles from repeating.

Reflection can also inspire long-term professional growth, especially when lawyers explore new ways to shape their careers through flexible learning paths. This can include options like pursuing an online Juris Doctorate program. Such opportunities help lawyers grow their skills, broaden their practice options, and align their careers with their goals.

Cleveland State University notes that an online JD program requires 90 credits and includes experiential learning. The best thing is that it can be completed part-time in just over three years.

Using Mindful Pauses to Interrupt Negative Thought Loops

Using mindful pauses is one of the most effective ways for lawyers to interrupt negative thought loops before they intensify. A mindful pause can be as simple as stopping for a moment and taking a slow breath. It also involves observing what is happening in your mind without getting pulled into it. This brief reset creates enough space to choose a calmer response instead of reacting automatically.

Verywell Mind also suggests shifting your focus through healthy distractions when thoughts feel especially persistent. Stepping outside, moving your body, getting absorbed in a project, or reading for a few minutes can all help. Even activities like tai chi or karate can clear the mind. These small pauses redirect mental energy and break the momentum of stress-driven thinking.

Body Awareness Practices That Release Tension and Promote Focus

Body awareness practices help lawyers release built-up tension and return to a state of steady focus during demanding workdays. These techniques involve checking in with physical sensations rather than ignoring them, which is something many attorneys unintentionally do while rushing between tasks.

Noticing tightness in areas like the jaw, shoulders, or lower back is an important first step. It gives you the chance to gently relax those spots with slow breathing or simple stretches. Even simple actions like rolling the shoulders, loosening the neck, or unclenching the hands can reduce stress immediately.

Bringing attention back to the body also quiets mental noise. The result is clearer thinking and more thoughtful, deliberate responses. This renewed physical awareness supports better concentration and more grounded decision-making.

Emotional Labeling to Reduce Overwhelm and Reclaim Control

Emotional labeling is a simple but powerful mindfulness practice that helps lawyers reduce overwhelm and regain a sense of control. Instead of getting swept up in stress, you pause and name what you feel.

Labeling the emotion creates space and helps you understand what is happening inside. This shift calms the nervous system and interrupts the urge to react quickly or defensively.

By identifying emotions with honesty and without judgment, lawyers can navigate challenging situations with more clarity, stability, and confidence.

Frequently Asked Questions

Can mindfulness help lawyers who struggle with chronic stress or anxiety?

Yes, mindfulness can help lawyers. It trains the mind to stay present, reduces overthinking, and calms the nervous system. With regular practice, lawyers often feel more grounded, clearer in their decisions, and better able to manage ongoing pressure.

What mindfulness techniques work best during high-stakes legal work?

Breathing exercises, grounding techniques, and brief mindful pauses work best during high-stakes legal work. These practices steady the mind, reduce tension, and help lawyers stay focused and composed. Even a few slow breaths or a quick sensory check can restore clarity in demanding moments.

How do I know if my mindfulness routine is actually working?

You’ll know your mindfulness routine is working when you notice small but consistent shifts. These may include calmer reactions, better focus, improved sleep, or less tension during stressful moments. You may also find it easier to pause before responding and recover more quickly from stressful situations.

Breaking the Cycle With Mindful Awareness

Mindfulness gives lawyers practical tools to step out of stress cycles and return to a steadier, more grounded way of working. Even small practices can create meaningful shifts in focus, clarity, and emotional balance.

By integrating these techniques into daily routines, lawyers can strengthen their resilience and navigate their profession with greater ease and confidence.

Author bio: Writer by day, dream catcher by night. Marchelle Abrahams cut her teeth during the infancy of the internet when the dial sound of the modem was more than a soundbite at a rave. Not a Millennial and not a Boomer, Marchelle is an in-betweener, making her a special breed of human. As a qualified journalist, Marchelle believes her superpower is stringing a few words together and people reading them. That, and the ability to take her kids on with her unique brand of gnarly comebacks.

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Why Lawyers Need Support in Tough Cases

I’m presenting a new CLE for Lawline today on dealing with difficult people in law practice. This is something that most lawyers come to experience at some point in their practice.

As I wrote last week, I have practiced with and against many fine lawyers in my years of practice. In fact, the majority of the attorneys I have worked with have been wonderful people.

Unfortunately, though the attorneys who have behaved badly are among the minority in my experience, they have created more than their fair share of stress and difficulty.

Difficult People in Law Practice

Even so, in the presentation I make an effort to separate the people from the behavior. I focus instead on offering strategies rooted in mindfulness and compassion that can help support one’s mental health and well-being when dealing with difficult cases.

I will share more about this in the CLE, but in case you can’t watch or attend, I offer the most important point here. The single best thing lawyers can do to support themselves when dealing with a difficult opposing counsel or party is to get help.

Lawyers Deserve Support with Difficult Cases

I’m sorry if that is a let down but it’s true. Lawyers tend to be independent people. We are accustomed to solving other people’s problems. As a result, we can sometimes exaggerate how many problems we can handle on our own.

But when I say “get help” here, I don’t mean to imply that lawyers can’t handle a difficult case on their own. In fact, most of us probably do this regularly. What I mean instead is that, for those really difficult cases involving counsel or parties with whom you struggle, getting some support can really help.

Social Support Is Essential for Lawyers

Remember that lawyers are humans first. The most effective and healthy way to process and manage stress is to get social support. If you are dealing with a difficult opposing counsel, client, or party in a case, you deserve support from colleagues, family, and friends.

This support may just be good for you. It also may be essential for ensuring that lawyers make good judgments about the case. In difficult times, even the most seasoned lawyers may struggle to see issues objectively when an opposing counsel has made their life miserable for months on end.

In this way, getting support from a trusted colleague or your firm’s ethics or general counsel may help you ensure your choices are strategic and not reliatory. This can help you stay true to your values in difficulty and stress instead of forgetting them due to high emotions.

How Lawyers Can Get Support for Their Cases

Some lawyers may struggle with asking for help. I know that I used to be like this. In recent years, though, I have drastically changed my approach. This is in part because I have learned that I often solve problems faster, most effectively, and with less pain when I do.

Dealing with difficult counsel, clients, or parties can create a lot of problems for lawyers. This can include extra work or overwhelm. It can also include dealing with big feelings, ranging from anxiety, frustration, anger, or even sadness. It can also include confusion about strategy and doubt or imposter syndrome about one’s own abilities.

In this way, you can start asking for help by seeking support or delegating work tasks if possible. You can also ask for help just by asking a trusted colleague or friend to listen while you share your feelings. Where possible, it can be a wonderful support to talk over a case with a fellow lawyer to get perspective and strategy ideas.

Getting Help Can Make Dealing with a Difficult Case Bearable

Of course, you know that getting help when dealing with a difficult case, opposing counsel, or party does not solve the whole problem. Getting help does not make all the stress go away. Social support does not mean lawyers can avoid the people or cases who make their law practice hard.

In my experience, though, getting some help and support does one really important thing. It makes dealing with the difficult case bearable. It makes the situation less lonely. It often reduces overwhelm. It can sometimes inspire confidence and newfound motivation to handle the matter effectively and stay true to your values.

If you are dealing with a difficult case, check out the new CLE on Lawline for tips and strategies for navigating it well. But if you can’t make it, follow my next best advice. Don’t handle the case entirely on your own. Get social support and help as you navigate the difficult case.

Image of founder Claire E. Parsons with details of Lawline CLE called "Dealing with Difficult People: Mindfulness Strategies for Lawyers"

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Five Reasons Kindness Is Essential for Lawyers

In honor of World Kindness Day, I am giving a talk this week on the power of kindness for lawyers and legal professionals. Many lawyers are skeptical of kindness, at least in relation to our work. We worry that kindness will be viewed as weakness by others and lead to passivity in ourselves.

Clearly, I don’t have illusions that I can convince an entire profession on this point, but I don’t think I have to do any convincing. If you pay attention to what kindness really is, you will see that it is powerful and essential for lawyers today. Here are five things to consider as you explore this for yourself.

1. Kindness Is Rare for Lawyers and Therefore Precious.

As a general matter, I have had mostly positive experiences with other lawyers. In general, I have experienced that lawyers are polite and professional in most settings. Real kindness, on the other hand, is more rare.

As discussed below, law practice is often challenging and filled with stress. This both makes kindness more essential and also more challenging. As most of us know, the difference between a difficult and unbearable situation is kindness. I cannot tell you how much of a difference it makes to work with an opposing counsel who is kind. We communicate more effectively and work through problems more efficiently as a result.

Though I know that many clients think they want a bulldog lawyer, I have found those types of litigators to often be ineffective. Therefore, if you want to really show power, calm, control, and courage in law practice, being kind is the way to go.

2. Kindness Is Essential in Difficult Times.

I have written before that kindness is an essential trait for difficult times. Lawyers, of course, are usually dealing with difficult times. We are literally paid to manage other people’s problems. This means our stock and trade is dealing with people going through really hard situations.

If lawyers are to weather these storms, we must learn skills for caring for ourselves and others. Sometimes this may include tending to our own fears, worries, and hurts. Sometimes it may mean patience with a stressed or unskillful opponent. And sometimes it may mean showing calm courage for our scared clients.

Either way, kindness is essential for lawyers because it helps us and our clients navigate challenging situations.

3. Kindness Is An Antidote to Fear and Aggression.

Because stress and conflict is a big part of law practice, fear and aggression unfortunately are too. This can be hard for our clients, but it is definitely hard for lawyers. One of the reasons that kindness is so powerful is that it helps people feel safe or at least safer.

In this way, kindness is an antidote to fear and aggression. It is a way that we can calm our own nerves and built trust and safety with those around us. Kindness may not make fear and aggression disappear entirely but it can help us create a sense of steadiness and comfort during emotional upheaval.

This can help lawyers focus more squarely on the relevant issues and avoid creating additional fights.

Image sharing the five ways that kindness is essential for lawyers as shared in the blog post

4. Kindness Builds the Connections that Lawyers Need.

Related to the feeling of safety is trust. Most lawyers know that relationships are at the core of law practice. Relationships permeate what we do as lawyers, including those with our firm, opposing counsel, and clients.

Kindness is a way to build trust because it is how we demonstrate care and concern for others. One of the reasons that litigation is so difficult is that trust is often lacking between parties and legal counsel as well. This is one reason that kind and professional speech is so important in litigation contexts.

When trust is lacking, it is easy to misunderstand each other and overreactions are bound to occur. Kindness is a way to cut through this animosity and rebuild the trust that is so essential to our working relationships.

5. Kindness Looks Soft but Feels Like Power.

The best and final argument I can make for kindness is not an argument at all. That’s because the best argument for kindness is in the experience of it. Lawyer struggle with kindness because it is easy to misunderstand.

In many situations, kindness has a softness to it. When we feel kindly towards someone, we may feel a softening of our hearts and a sense of generosity towards them. When someone is kind to us, we may notice a quiet, soothing voice and a non-threatening posture.

Next time you offer or experience kindness, though, I urge you to pay closer attention. Though kindness undoubtedly has a softness to it, it often also includes stability, calm, courage, and support. In this way, even though kindness may look soft to an observer, it often feels powerful to those who give and receive it.

In truth, kindness is power because it offers us the possibility of transforming a situation or building a connection with a little bit of courage, presence, and an open heart.

Don’t Take My Word for It. Try This for Yourself.

Here’s the truth: you probably already know how essential kindness is. Most of us wouldn’t have gotten as far as we have without kindness in our lives. Even so, most of us would love to have more kindness in our lives. If you are nervous about showing more kindness in your life or work, you aren’t alone. Kindness takes courage, discipline, and patience.

But when you pay attention, you may notice that it feels really good and usually leads to even better results. That’s what this post was really about anyway. I hope it helps you know where to look and to look for when it comes to kindness in your life and work. The more you study and notice kindness, the more you will want to experience and share it with others.

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Collective Care and Lawyer Wellness

Beyond the Individual Focus

Self-care habits like rest, exercise, and mindfulness are meaningful parts of a healthy legal career. They help lawyers steady themselves against the pace and pressure of daily practice, yet resilience doesn’t come only from looking inward.

An even broader source of balance can be found when lawyers give time and attention to causes beyond the office. Serving and caring for the community is sometimes referred to as “collective care” and shifting focus outward in this way can widen your perspective, relieve stress, and create a sense of connection that the profession itself doesn’t always provide.

What Collective Care Means

Collective care takes shape through service outside of billable work. It can look like volunteering with a nonprofit, mentoring a younger lawyer, serving on a board, or joining a civic project. The value comes less from the scale of the effort and more from the consistency. A steady commitment, even in small doses, creates connection and purpose that extend beyond daily casework.

Stress Relief in High-Conflict Work

So much of legal work is built on conflict because you’re fighting deadlines, pushing through discovery, arguing points that never seem to end. The grind can take a toll, but contributing to community projects can flip the script and help manage the stress. Instead of bracing for a fight, you’re working with people who share a goal, which can take pressure off and help you come back to the office with a clearer head.

Identity Beyond Case Outcomes

The Narrow Scorecard

Lawyers constantly deal with numbers, things like billable hours, win rates, settlement or verdict amounts, which makes it easy to reduce a career to a set of scores. A bad result in court or a client who walks away unhappy can feel like a judgment on you as a person, not just your work.

A Broader Foundation

Service outside of the office can help change the way you see things. When you mentor a younger lawyer or sit on a nonprofit board, no one is keeping track of wins and losses and the value shows up in relationships built and in the progress of the people you help. Being involved in collective care settings can remind you that your worth doesn’t live only in case outcomes.

Image of guest poster with quote from the blog post that says "Lawyers who give time outside of their practice discover energy and perspective that steady them for the long run. Service ties you to people and goals beyond the case at hand, and that connection can make a demanding career feel sustainable."

Mentorship and Role Modeling

When experienced lawyers give time to mentoring or to projects in the community, they can set an example that highly influences younger attorneys. Balance doesn’t come only from managing hours or squeezing in rest; it also grows from steady contribution to something larger than your own practice. A mentor who makes space for work like this shows that holistic wellness includes more than self-care.

Over time, those choices set a standard. New lawyers see that longevity in practice depends not only on private routines but also on the connections built through service. It gives a new perspective on what a legal career can look like by showing that resilience grows from community as well as personal habits. Over time, that perspective influences how newer lawyers balance the demands of practice with the need for purpose outside of it.

Perspective from Practice

Community work has been a steady part of my career. Our firm has donated to Austin nonprofits, helped build playgrounds, supported food banks, and backed programs that strengthen families. Giving in this way doesn’t take me out of my role as a lawyer; it gives me the perspective to do it better.

Focusing on causes outside of daily legal work provides balance and contributing to the community helps reduce stress and allows lawyers to return to their clients with stronger energy and focus.

What’s important isn’t the size of the contribution but the habit of returning to service again and again. Each project is a reminder that the profession doesn’t have to drain you if you anchor yourself in something larger.

Simple Ways to Start

Lawyers will sometimes hesitate to take on community projects because the workweek already feels overloaded. Fitting in one more thing can feel impossible, but collective care doesn’t need to mean adding hours you don’t have. It can begin with a single commitment that fits naturally into your schedule, like mentoring one law student each semester or serving on the board of a neighborhood nonprofit.

The key is to begin, even on a small scale and then once community involvement becomes part of your calendar, it starts to feel less like an obligation and more like a steady source of perspective.

Wellness Through Community Connection

Collective care, though community work doesn’t replace personal wellness habits, but it complements them in a way nothing else can. Lawyers who give time outside of their practice discover energy and perspective that steady them for the long run. Service ties you to people and goals beyond the case at hand, and that connection can make a demanding career feel sustainable.

Author Bio: Adam Loewy is a leading personal injury attorney in Austin with over two decades of experience. Since founding Loewy Law Firm in 2005, he’s handled serious injury and wrongful death cases, consistently securing multi-million dollar recoveries for his clients. Known for keeping a more focused docket, he ensures each case receives full attention, while his firm extends its impact through charitable giving, community sponsorships, and support of local nonprofits.

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How Mindfulness Helps Break Mental Patterns

Seeing your mental patterns clearly is one of the biggest benefits of a mindfulness practice. I experienced this recently and the results of a few minutes of meditation were so pronounced that I had to write about it. I had a big attack of anxiety about a party with my law firm. Despite this beginning, the night was actually really fun. I had an amazing time and ended up singing “Pink Pony Club” in front of my colleagues without the slightest feeling of fear.

So what changed? How did I go from social anxiety to social butterfly in the course of a night? The long story is that I have practiced mindfulness for more than a decade. The short answer relevant to this particular situation is that I spotted my mental pattern.

This post will share some steps for recognizing and navigating challenging mental patterns with mindfulness and self-compassion.

What Are Mental Patterns?

People new to meditation are likely to notice that the mind generates a lot of thoughts. If you keep meditating long enough, you eventually will see that thoughts are often not original. Many of the same thoughts repeat themselves or fall into categories.

These can fall into a wide array of categories, but many people have a select few that dominate their minds. Some examples include obsession with planning, a recurrent theme of self-doubt, or even a preoccupation with past harms or slights.

One of my most obnoxious mental patterns is the anxiety that arises around social settings. No matter what I do, I can’t seem to shake the fear of being rejected in a social situations. This can make it hard to enjoy myself during the networking events and parties that lawyers often have to attend.

Clearly, taken to the extreme or left unchecked, patterns like this can cause us to feel shame, and miss out on connection, opportunities, and fun. This is why learning to recognize and navigate mental patterns is one of the most important power moves that mindfulness practice can offer.

The Problem: Mental Patterns Can Be Tricky

Here’s the problem with well-worn mental patterns: we often don’t recognize them for what they are. Many lawyers are too busy to pay close attention to our thoughts and feelings. We also are often intent on projecting an image of strong self-assuredness.

So, when nasty mental patterns arise, they can be hard to spot. These patterns don’t announce themselves. Instead, they slink in through the back door of your mind and whisper awful things about you and your life. They have the bleakest and most savage view of every situation.

In my case, the pattern revealed itself by creating little worries about nearly everything associated with the event. My mind criticized the outfit I had selected. It worried about whether my shoes would be too uncomfortable. It offered concerns about whether I would be too tired to have fun. It presented me with mental imagery of me standing alone in a crowded room with nobody to talk to.

Does any of this sound familiar?

Image with quote from blog post that says "mental patterns don't announce themselves. Instead, they slink in through the back door of your mind and whisper awful things about you and your life."

Mindfulness Can Help You Recognize Mental Patterns

After a while of these nagging thoughts, I started to zoom out and get some perspective. Instead of seeing the thoughts as individual rational reflections, I saw them for what they were. These thoughts were the manifestation of my social anxiety.

This hardly sounds like good news, right? I know it is counterintuitive to feel relief that a litany of negative self-talk is *just* one’s anxiety. Even so, there is a very practical benefit to be had from recognizing that the worrisome thoughts are part of a pattern.

An implicit idea underlying all of my nasty thoughts was the idea that I was not good enough and would never be good enough. This is a constant lie that anxiety tells me. But when I saw the mental pattern as just my social anxiety talking, I realized that it was not the voice of reason. I stopped believing it for a moment and that gave me enough space to break free.

The Practice: Holding the Toxic Mental Pattern in Mindful Awareness

When I created enough space, I saw that I was struggling. So I did the thing that I have trained myself over years to do: I took a pause.

It is not a fun to sit and let nasty thoughts just bounce around in your mind. I am sure that this is why so many people say that they can’t meditate. Trust me, I get it. It truly sucks.

Over the years, however, I have learned something cool. If you can sit and let the thoughts bounce around in your mind, they don’t hurt so much. Sometimes the thoughts change. Sometimes other insights arise to counter them. Or sometimes the thoughts just bounce around until they lose energy and they just stop or disappear.

With this experience, I knew that I should just meditate for a few minutes and let the thoughts do whatever they wanted. I let them wash over me and thrash around. All the while I kept returning my focus to my breath or softening and relaxing my body.

Finally, the big insight came that I was nervous about the party. My thoughts weren’t truths. They were signs of my fear. They were signals that I wanted to connect with people, but was afraid I wouldn’t be able to do so.

The Red Flag: Don’t Judge Yourself

In years past, noticing a childlike vulnerability like this in myself might have made me feel worse. But in my case, this was actually the path forward. Years of mindfulness practice, has taught me a lot about self-compassion. That has helped me cultivate a healthy dose of caution when it comes to self-judgment.

Instead of feeling like a loser about my anxiety, I recognized that I just needed some self-assurances. I needed to take care of my fear. First, I offered myself some perspective by reminding myself that this was supposed to be fun instead of a test. Then I remembered that I did not have to stay at the party for any specific period and could leave if it wasn’t fun.

Finally, I drew on common humanity to remember that I was probably not the only person who had these fears. I recalled that social situations are hard for a lot of people and that we had several other new people in the firm. In reality, most of us were too busy, but we made the effort to attend the party because connection matters.

Image sharing the four steps to break mental patterns with mindfulness as shared in the blog post: recognize, hold it in awareness, use self-compassion, and disobey the pattern.

The Result: Being Brave Enough to Break the Pattern

The final step of the process is to break the pattern. Once you see the pattern, investigate it, and take care of yourself, the only way to get out of a pattern is to disobey it.

I won’t lie. This is really hard. If you are new to mindfulness practice, it may not always be possible to get out of mental patterns so easily or you may have to take baby steps. As someone who has practiced mindfulness for more than a decade, I have learned that part of changing my patterns is acceptance.

Life experience helps me run a quick cost benefit analysis whenever my anxiety flares up. I know that fear, worry, and nerves are often going to be part of many social activities I undertake. So I sit with them, take care of my fear, and then make the brave choice to proceed anyway.

Before the party, all my anxious thoughts were attempted roadblocks. They were concocted objections and warnings trying to convince me to skip the party. Life experience has taught me that the best way to silence those thoughts was to take their power. I did that by ignoring them. I just decided to go to the party and be afraid. A few minutes in at the party, I wasn’t afraid anymore.

Conclusion: Mindfulness Practice Is One Way to Check Mental Patterns

Don’t get me wrong here. There are a lot different types of mental patterns. All of us cannot necessarily expect to face those mental patterns on our own. We all deserve the support of trusted friends, medication, and other mental health treatment to face down our most challenging mental patterns, including those relating to anxiety. Even so, one of the great blessings of mindfulness practice is that it can help you support yourself and build the skills to check, disrupt, and break free from some of the mental patterns that hold you back.

This post is just one example of how this can be done, but once you learn a process that works for you it can help you many times over the course of your life. I hope that, like I was able to do in the example shared here, you can recognize difficult mental patterns before they keep you from doing the things you want to do in life.

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Talking Meditation with the Lawyers Who Learn Podcast

Image from appearance of Claire Parsons on the Lawyers Who Learn Podcast with title "The Meditation Practice That Built a Speaking and Legal Career"

When I started meditating more than a decade ago, building new skills was the last thing on my mind. As I shared in a recent episode on the Lawyers Who Learn podcast, this is exactly what happened.

At that time, I was treading water and desperate for anything that might provide a little bit of relief. I was a new mom and a young litigation associate with a major case heading to trial. This is when I started meditating–one minute each day–and I was shocked when it actually helped me.

Over time, it helped my life and law practice so much that I started teaching. I share this story and a lot of insights about mindfulness on the podcast episode.

What Is the Lawyers Who Learn Podcast?

Lawyers Who Learn is a podcast created by the founder of Lawline David Schnurman. If you aren’t familiar, Lawline is an online CLE provider. I have already done two Lawline courses on compassion fatigue and confidence. Next month, I will be presenting a new CLE on dealing with difficult people, including opposing counsel.

Obviously, Lawline found me through our past collaborations. However, I was pleased to appear on the podcast because it’s purpose is aligned with my own personal mission. The show explores how an attorney’s lifelong learning fuels their growth. On the podcast, there are many stories of attorneys like me who have learned new skills and used to improve their lives and law practices.

What Were the Highlights of the Podcast Episode?

In the show, I share how I got started with meditation and how it helped my life and work. I also explained a few ways that mindfulness and compassion practice support my life and work now. This includes dealing with high-conflict and emotional cases, as well as the trials and tribulations of staying calm with a teenager in the house.

I also shared a lot about how I began teaching mindfulness to lawyers and professionals. Though I confess that I have always enjoyed public speaking, the truth is that it was very much a learning process. Importantly, I explained in the episode that a big turning point for me was learning to deal with fear.

What is the Biggest Insight about Meditation from the Episode?

My favorite part of the episode was when David asked me to explain how I finally decided to get started. People ask this for an obvious reason. Mindfulness practice may make you more aware, but it does not automatically make you more brave. Right?

As I have written before, this may not be exactly right. In truth, mindfulness helped me become more brave because it helped me face fear. I mean this in the most literal way possible.

When I started to notice fear and all the details surrounding it, I got a little bored with it. I realized I could tolerate it. After some time and a little work with self-compassion, I decided I could just let fear be there as I did whatever I wanted to do in life.

Where Can I Find the Lawyers Who Learn Podcast Episode?

If you want to check out the full podcast episode, you have a few options:

You can listen to it on your web browser here on Lawline’s website.
You can listen to it on your normal podcast providers, including Apple, Amazon, Spotify, iHeartRadio, and Podbean.
You can also watch it on YouTube here:

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Five Tips for Mindful Walking to Enhance Well-Being

Unintentionally over the last several months, I formed a nice self-care habit. Whenever I have time, I take a mindful walk after dinner. I wouldn’t call this walking meditation because it’s not quite so slow or focused. But I wouldn’t say it’s clearly outside of the realm of meditation either.

That’s because my mindful walking habit has become a real support for me. It helps me when my mind is busy, my spirits are low, or if I just need to move a little bit and enjoy a nice day.

If you want to try a making mindful walking part of your routine, this can tell you how. Here are the five key elements of a mindful walk.

1. Leave Your Phone at Home While Walking

This one is not a hard and fast rule. There’s no shame in using your phone for safety or to listen to a workout video or music to support your walk. Talking with a friend on your phone while you walk is also a great way to support a healthy habit.

If you don’t need it, though, I encourage you to leave your phone at home. One reason is that most of us are bombarded by screens in daily life. For that reason, taking a walk without your phone may feel really good. I leave my phone at home to avoid the temptation of looking at it and distracting myself from the walk.

In this way, the first way to to make your walk mindful is to leave your phone at home when you walk out the door.

2. Try Walking with No Destination

Another important thing to leave out of mindful walking is a destination. Sure, you can select a destination for a walk if you like, but it helps to leave the route open-ended.

Next time you walk somewhere, notice what happens when you walk with a destination. In my experience, having a set goal in mind means that the end location takes over. To really let the walk be about the journey, let the destination go.

If, like me, you don’t have the ability to walk “nowhere” easily, you can make this very simple. Pick the easiest two-way route you can and stick to that route. Over time, getting to your goal won’t be the thing; experiencing the walk will be the the most essential piece.

In short, if you want to take a mindful walk, it helps to let the destination go and just walk.

3. Take Your Time as You Walk

It should come as no surprise that the next aspect of mindful walking is slowing down. Most people these days rush through life. Most lawyers and professionals feel a constant state of time urgency.

One of the simplest things you can do to manage stress is to start to notice this tendency to rush. An easy way to do that is to start slowing down routine activities when you have the time. Most often, we walk for functional reasons and we forget how good it can feel to get outside and move.

It’s not necessary to move at a snail’s pace to make space for mindful awareness with walking. But it helps if you can move slowly enough that you feel like you are savoring the experience of walking. Next time you take a walk, try to consciously take your time and notice what a difference it makes.

Image of person walking in woods with overly of listing of five tips for mindful walking as shared in the blog post

4. Mindfully Observe Your Surroundings

I know that we all don’t live or work close to what most of us would call nature. We may live near busy streets or urban areas with lots of activity. Though natural spaces are ideal for mindful walking, they are not necessarily essential.

Mindfulness isn’t just about trying to achieve a peak state or perfectly calm state. Instead, it’s about awareness with things as they are. As you walk, pay attention to your surroundings. Notice all the sensations. If you can walk near a natural setting, take full advantage of it.

Sounds like water rushing and bird song are shown to lower stress levels because they signify safety. Whether I have nature sounds or not, paying attention to surroundings is great for mindful walking because it helps me reconnect with my body and get out of my thoughts.

5. Let the Thoughts Come and Go

Speaking of thoughts, my last tip is that you don’t have to fight them off during mindful walking. Inevitably as you walk, thoughts will arise. That’s no problem. It doesn’t mean you’ve failed at mindful walking. It just means you are human.

The good thing about thoughts when I am walking, though, is that it’s a bit harder to get sucked into them. When I walk, I am more in touch with my body because it is moving. There’s also a big wide world of space that makes any thoughts in my mind feel a little bit smaller.

Just as in meditation, you don’t have to clear your mind to take a mindful walk. Instead, with some time and patience, you can learn to let the thoughts come and go.

Give Mindful Walking a Try

Mindful walking can be a supportive way to get some movement, enjoy outdoors, reduce stress, and cultivate mindfulness. If you want to make mindful walking a habit, give these five tips a try.

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How Much Do Lawyers Need Deep Work?

I have a book club discussion with other lawyers coming up, so I recently read Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World by Cal Newport. (paid link) Consistent with the book title, I was glad to have had a few hours concentrated time to digest the book during a long car ride.

As you might assume, Deep Work is about finding focus in an increasingly digital and unfocused world. Unlike the book, Stolen Focus, which a friend reviewed on the blog previously, this book is less about examining the role of technology in our lives. Deep Work addresses this but it is more interested in correcting the loss of focus that technology has caused in work and life.

Because Deep Work offers strategies around a common pain point for many lawyers, I decided to share a review here. Read on to learn my likes, dislikes, and takeaways from the book.

What I Like about Deep Work

Though I have a few criticisms of the book, here are the three things I liked most about Deep Work:

1. The Book Addresses a Common Problem for Many Lawyers

It’s hard to argue how distracted and unfocused most lawyers and professionals are these days. Many of us are too busy and our mental health, happiness, and and work performance suffers as a result.

Though Deep Work is now almost ten years old, it remains an important read because focused attention is so lacking for most of us. The book makes a compelling argument about the need to solve big problems and how essential uninterrupted attention is to doing that.

Perhaps my favorite part of the book was that it explains how intertwined focused attention is with happiness. The book discusses the idea that humans find meaning in the places we direct our attention. Though the book primarily addresses focus at work, it points to something deeper about human happiness and well-being. If you struggle with feeling distracted at work, Deep Work may offer some validation and thoughts for a way to find clarity.

2. Deep Work Correctly Identifies Technology as a Major Source of Distraction

It’s hard to argue that technology is both a blessing and a curse for most lawyers and professionals. The evidence continues to pile up which shows that technology has had massive negative effects on mental health and work performance. In this regard, Deep Work correctly zeroes in on technology, specifically email and social media, as the likely problem areas.

As discussed below, not everyone has the freedom to implement limits on email or social media use. Even so, I have had to find ways to manage this myself. Many law firms and companies are now working to implement policies to help employees find a better balance when it comes to work-life balance. Books like Deep Work may have influenced this positive trend by encouraging limits for better focus at work.

3. It Offers Analysis and Solutions that Lawyers and Others Can Easily Implement

Perhaps the best thing about Deep Work is the practical solutions it offers for finding more focus. The book does not claim that focused attention is one-size-fits-all. Instead, it explains the varying approaches that professionals may take with respect to deep work. These include:

The monastic approach where you cloister yourself away for periods of intense concentrated work;
The bimodal approach which schedules focused work and shallow work on separate days each week;
The rhythmic approach which incorporates blocks of focused work into a routine and often follows a pattern; and
The journalist approach where you learn to focus in small or found increments of time amidst less concentrated periods.

Identifying your personal philosophy when it comes to focused work can be helpful in itself. Hearing these varied strategies also helped me understand that focused work can manifest differently depending on context.

Of course, even if you have an established philosophy of deep work that suits you, impediments to concentration are bound to arise. For this reason, I appreciated that the book shared some strategies for making email more efficient, limiting social media, or even just getting away from your phone.

One of the best strategies the book offers is the idea of “productive meditation.” This is when you take a walk or do something physical, like cooking or cleaning the house, and let your mind process an idea. I can personally vouch for this approach because I have used it for everything from pondering a question of legal strategy to writing my book.

In short, there are many great points about Deep Work. It addresses and correctly diagnoses a common problem for many lawyers and professionals and it offers practical solutions that can help.

Image titled "What Kind of Deep Worker Are You" with four descriptions as shared in the blog post

Criticisms of Deep Work

As discussed above, Deep Work is a worthy read but it has a few drawbacks. Here they are.

1. The Book Assumes Technology Is the Culprit for Distraction

When I read Deep Work, I kept thinking “but what if it is not email or social that’s distracting you?” As I said above, Newport is correct that our phones have a distracting and in many cases negative influence on our lives and work. But what Newport fails to address is the fact that not all of us can achieve focus just by managing our phones.

Newport references his family at times in the book, but it’s telling when he says he wanted to “be present for them.” As a mom, I never had the option not to be present for my family. My source of distraction was not always my phone, but instead a child who may be hungry, sick, or need a ride to an activity. Deep Work did not address this issue at all and it assumes that you have a certain level of control in life and work that many lawyers or working parents don’t have.

Clearly, not all books can be everything for everyone. If you want more on the art and science of managing time which integrates both work and family caregiving responsibilities, I suggest Laura Vanderkam’s work.

2. It Was Odd that the Author Appeared to Ignore Mindfulness

Deep Work is a book ostensibly about focus. It recommends strategies and practices to increase focused attention at work. Despite the fact, the book barely mentions mindfulness practices.

To be fair, it is possible that the author wanted to avoid delving into a territory in which he’s not an expert. He may have wished to avoid offering what he perceived to be another meditation or mindfulness book. Newport had a right to focus his work in the way he wished.

Still, the book was published in 2016 and there was ample research demonstrating the efficacy of mindfulness practices to improve focus. As a lawyer who has experienced the benefits of these practices in may law practice, especially in relation to focused attention, reading Deep Work felt a bit incomplete.

3. Deep Work Assumes You Need Deep Work

The other thing I kept wondering about as I read the book is “how much do lawyers really need deep work?” Don’t get me wrong, I think most lawyers need some deep work. Some lawyers probably rely on periods of deep work for most of their days.

For me, though, I have to admit that a lot of my work is shallow. Much of my work consists of client emails with simple questions and addressing banal problems. Deep Work addresses this to a certain degree by sharing an example that some C-suite executives thrive in mostly shallow work.

But the book does not offer much in terms of evaluating the relevance and importance of deep work in most professional lives. Instead, the book seems to assume it is valuable and essential for most professionals. Thus, if you are curious about how much deep work matters to your own life, the book may not help to self-assess on that issue.

In short, though Deep Work is a good book to read it is not a perfect book. This is not an argument against reading it, but instead a suggestion that further reading on the topic may be needed.

Brief book review of Deep Work by Cal Newport as shared in the blog post explaining what it offers to lawyers and professionals

Key Takeaways from Deep Work

Deep Work is a good read for lawyers and professionals who are interested in creating a work life that facilitates focused attention. It offers a compelling argument for the importance of deep work for most professionals that holds true to this day. It also correctly identifies technology as a common impediment for focused attention and suggests a variety of practical strategies that may help.

Despite its downsides, Deep Work is worth the few hours of your time. It will help you consider where your attention goes and whether it is serving you well. It is a good book to read, consider, and discuss.

The link to the book mentioned in this review is an affiliate link. The review is unsponsored and sincere but the link to Amazon is paid.

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