Four Easy Ways to Add Movement to Meditation

Image of man sitting with hands raised with title of blog post "Four Easy Ways to Add Movement to Meditation"

I have been traveling a lot this summer, so movement is on my mind. One of the common issues many people new to meditation ask me about is moving. Some people worry that they can’t meditate because they can’t sit still. One easy answer to this question is the reminder that you don’t have to sit still to meditate.

Though movement is discouraged during sitting meditation, it’s not because movement is bad. Instead, movement is discouraged to encourage its opposite: stillness. In this way, it is sometimes wise to move a bit to scratch an itch or adjust your posture.

In addition, mindfulness can be cultivated with intentional movement practices too. Anyone who does yoga, tai chi, or qigong regularly knows that movement can support a calming of the mind. The same is true for movement during sitting meditation itself. Here are five simple ways to incorporate movement into your meditation practice.

1. Use an Object to Track Breath

Breath focus is one of the most common and practical styles of meditation. Though this style is seemingly simple, there are many ways to follow the breath. Many people count the breaths or cycles of breath internally by, for instance, counting on each inhale.

A. Breathing with Beads

Some of us, myself included, tend to get lost in all the counting and may have an easier time tracking a physical object. I do this with a string of beads. There are traditional and formal ways to use beads for meditation but I am more flexible. I let each bead represent a full cycle and advance to the next bead on the space between breaths.

B. Pop It Practice

After I started using beads in this way, I realized that I could do the same thing with one of my kid’s Pop It toys. I inhale, exhale, and pop one of the buttons. When one side is fully popped, I flip to the next side and start again. Now I keep a Pop It on my keychain so that I can meditate for a minute or two whenever and wherever I need it.

2. Sync Hand Movement with Breath

If you don’t have beads or another object, you can still bring some small movements into practice with your hands. As I have shared before, syncing breath and movement is a great way to calm the mind and cultivate mindful presence.

A. Finger Practice

One practice I really like is finger meditation. With this practice, you run your finger along the edge of your opposite hand while breathing. Starting with your thumb, run your finger up to the tip while inhaling, and then run your finger down the inside of your thumb while exhaling. Continue with this pattern until you get to your pinky as shown in the image. Then you can switch to the other hand.

Image demonstrating flow of finger meditation as explained in the blog post

B. Breathing with Hand Movement

Another similar option is to raise and lower your hands or extend and clench your fists while you breathe. I prefer to inhale and raise or extend my hands and exhale and lower or clench my palms. You can try this practice out for a few rounds of breath and see what feels most supportive to you.

While these aren’t practices I use every day, they come in handy during times when my mind is very active or strong emotions are present.

3. Walking Meditation

As I have written before, walking meditation is always an option. It’s a good option to explore, too, if you ever plan on trying a retreat. Walking meditation is often used during retreats as a break from sitting meditation. Thus, if you want some movement while cultivating mindfulness, walking meditation can be supportive.

Another great advantage of walking meditation is that it helps you bring mindfulness into your life. Because the practice is done during movement, it helps you strengthen the trait of mindfulness during your normal daily activities.

4. Standing Figure 8 Movement Practice

Even if you have an established sitting meditation practice, you may eventually need to try standing meditation. If you practice sitting meditation long enough, you will eventually encounter sleepiness or mental dullness. Standing meditation is a practical way to wake up and energize yourself while continuing mindfulness practice.

Figure 8 meditation is a wonderful way to add some movement to your standing practice. With this practice, as indicated in the image, you move in a figure 8 motion while standing by subtly shifting your weight along the borders of your feet in a swaying motion.

Image showing figure 8 standing meditation as explained in blog post

Anyone who has rocked a baby or a small pet understands why this practice is great. Rocking and swaying are soothing to our nervous systems. This gentle motion can help us to soothe ourselves and help us relax quickly. The good news is that this practice can be done however you like. Add a bit more movement of the hips and hands if you wish to dance. Keep it small if you are waiting in line at the grocery store and don’t want to be noticed.

Conclusion: Add Some Movement to Your Meditation

Sitting in stillness during meditation is a wonderful way to cultivate patience, calm, and equanimity. But it isn’t the only way. Mindfulness can be cultivate with movement and meditation can be practiced in any posture. This posts offers just a few ideas for incorporating movement into your meditation practice. These practices can be incorporated into your regular meditation sessions or done quickly on the go.


To learn more about the movement practices discussed in this post, check out the Coping Strategies Ebook. This free download has more explanation and demonstration of several practices for finding steadiness in stressful times.

If you want to try a traditional meditation practice that incorporates a visualization of movement, check out my rocking chair meditation. This is a traditional breath focus practice but it uses the image of a rocking chair to help you rest and relax with the movements of the breath.


Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, A New Year’s Present, to learn about mindfulness from a heartwarming story. For a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days, try How to Be a Badass Lawyer. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.

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What Is MBCT? An Interview with a Mindfulness Expert

Image of interview subject from blog post with title "What Is MBCT? An Interview with a Mindfulness Expert"

Back in May, I met Sophie Lazarus, PhD when I was about to start a seven-day meditation retreat. It started out as a simple conversation about our mindfulness practices. When the topic of work came up, I realized I had met an expert on mindfulness-based cognitive therapy.

As you will learn if you keep reading, MBCT is a treatment program rooted in mindfulness that can help people who have experienced anxiety and depression. It’s not as well-known in the United States as other programs, like mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR) so I asked Dr. Lazarus to explain more here. Read on to learn more about the program and for other helpful resources.

Q: Tell me about yourself and your work as it relates to mindfulness-based cognitive therapy?

I live and work in Columbus, Ohio, though I am originally from the East Coast. Outside of work, I love reading, spending time in nature, traveling, and connecting with friends and family.

My journey with mindfulness began in 2009 during graduate school and deepened in 2014 when I started practicing in the insight meditation tradition. I’m a clinical psychologist and currently serve as an Associate Professor at The Ohio State University Wexner Medical Center. I lead the Mindfulness-Based Programs for Resilience and Well-Being and am a faculty member within our Depression Recovery Center.

In my role, I develop programs, conduct research on MBCT and other treatments for depression, supervise and train PhD students, and provide care for individuals experiencing mood and anxiety disorders. I trained as an MBCT teacher through UC San Diego in 2018 and have since expanded my training to include MBCT-L (Mindfulness for Life) and workplace mindfulness through the Oxford Mindfulness Foundation. I’m also the author of Mindfulness Meditations for Depression: Practices for Cultivating Self-Compassion and Insight.

Q: What is Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT)

Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT) is an eight-week, group-based intervention designed for individuals who experience recurrent depression, anxiety, or chronic unhappiness. It integrates cognitive therapy techniques with mindfulness practices to help people become more aware of the thought patterns and habits that contribute to emotional distress.

By cultivating this awareness, participants learn to relate to their experiences with greater kindness and wisdom, supporting long-term well-being. MBCT is best suited for individuals who are not currently in the midst of a severe depressive or anxious episode and are ready to focus on relapse prevention and staying well.

Q: How does MBCT compare to other kinds of mindfulness programs like MBSR? 

MBCT was originally modeled after Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR), but tailored specifically for individuals dealing with depression and anxiety. Researchers recognized that while existing treatments were effective, many people still experienced relapse. Mindfulness offered a promising approach to address this specific vulnerability.

MBCT incorporates core elements of MBSR but adds specific practices and psychoeducation to help participants understand the nature of depression and anxiety. It teaches skills to work wisely with the mental habits—such as rumination and avoidance—that often accompany these conditions.

Image with quote from blog post explaining what mindfulness-based cognitive therapy (MBCT) is

Q: Does MBCT offer any specific advantages for lawyers or other professionals?

Absolutely. MBCT can be particularly beneficial for conscientious, high-achieving professionals—such as lawyers—who often operate with high standards, perfectionism, and self-critical thinking. While these traits can drive success, they may also make it harder to cope with internal challenges like disappointment or loss, especially when those experiences can’t be “solved” in the usual way.

MBCT helps individuals recognize these patterns and develop a more compassionate and balanced way of relating to themselves, which can be transformative both personally and professionally.

Q: What are you most excited for people to know about MBCT?

MBCT is backed by strong research evidence that has accumulated over many years. It significantly reduces the risk of relapse in depression and is included in national treatment guidelines in both the UK and the U.S. (APA). Given the profound impact of depression on individuals, families, and society, I’m passionate about making MBCT more widely available to those who could benefit.

Q: How can people interested in mindfulness learn more about MBCT or access the program? 

We offer MBCT through the Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Health at Ohio State. Groups are available both in-person and virtually, making them accessible to anyone in Ohio—and in other PSYPACT-participating states. To learn more or register for MBCT and other mindfulness-based programs for resilience and well-being, visit our website.

You can also find trusted MBCT providers internationally through this directory.


Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, A New Year’s Present, to learn about mindfulness from a heartwarming story. For a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days, try How to Be a Badass Lawyer. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.

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Understanding Perfectionism: Lessons from Season 4 of The Bear

Picture of chef placing parsley on a dish with the title of the blog post "Understanding Perfectionism: Lessons from Season 4 of The Bear"

Spoiler Alert: Read with caution if you haven’t finished watching Season 4 of The Bear yet. There are a few references to the end of season that some might consider spoilers.

“Mistakes.”

When I heard this word uttered in the latest season of The Bear, it cut like a knife. This single word accentuated the theme for the season: perfectionism. Carmy, the head chef and lead of the show, said it when his colleague and sometimes screaming match partner, Richie, asked him what he was thinking about after a grueling night at the restaurant.

With only a word, Carmy let all the perfectionists watching know exactly what he was experiencing. He was ruminating over his past failures. They were swirling in his mind. It’s fair to imagine they had been with him that entire day, screaming in his ear while he was trying to live his life. Fans of The Bear also immediately knew that they had been with Carmy a lot longer than that.

Perfectionism Can Be a Mistake

The surprising thing that you come to see later is that one of the mistakes that Carmy had to have been thinking about was perfectionism. In the episodes that follow this tepid bath of negative thoughts and self-recrimination, Carmy makes some positive steps forward. He scales back on his overly ambitious strategies. He eases up on his colleagues, Syndey and Marcus, enough to see that they have become masterful chefs. And he even apologizes to his girlfriend months after a panic attack caused him to flee the relationship and ghost her.

As I watched the season, I couldn’t help but see it as a mirror for my own life. I joked with my husband that watching this season in college would have saved me a whole lot of heartache over the years. Just like Carmy, perfectionism was never something I chose but it continues to be something exceptionally hard for me to stop. As the show illustrates, some of us are incentivized for our efforts to be perfect. This makes it very hard to see that perfectionism has its downsides too.

The Downsides of Perfectionism

Season 4 of The Bear shows us these downsides. It shows us how Carmy can’t enjoy success or relax with peace. It shows us how perfectionism can erode the relationships around us and wear down the people we love. It shows us that good results are a double-edged sword for perfectionists.

We may feel good for a moment, but as soon as that moment fades, we are thinking, often unconsciously, of how we can raise the bar higher. When that bar gets too high, and it always does, we crash and feel like failures. This can cause us to turn what we love into a grind, so that even the things we are good at suddenly feel hard.

The Bear Is a Realistic Depiction of Perfectionism

If you are thinking that I am telling you that Season 4 of The Bear is painful to watch, you are right. It was painful for me to watch, but only because it was so painfully true. I knew how easy it is to absorb perfectionism even if no person in your life consciously pushed it on you.

Even if we come from a loving family, the desire to be good and create something good can get twisted by what we miss or maybe by what we see too much in childhood. By the time we get out of school, our tendency to be organized, conscientious, and high performing helps us excel in demanding and intense professions.

And before we know it, we start to emulate the very behaviors we told ourselves we never would. We do this all with the noblest of intentions. We want to make something better, more decent, and gentler than we have ever had. It’s just that we never learned the skills to build this peaceful life we want.

The Good News for the Perfectionists Out There

It absolutely hurt to watch Season 4 of The Bear and to relive all the ways I have hurt myself and others in the process. The good news, for me and for all the perfectionists out there, is that the season has some light at the end of the tunnel. By the end of the season, Carmy has stopped thinking so obsessively about all his mistakes. He starts instead to face them and tries to learn how to avoid repeating them. He stops isolating himself. He gets out of his head. He leans on his friends and admits how he feels.

By the end of the season, Carmy is not fully self-actualized. It is a TV show after all and TV shows about peaceful people who have things figured out would probably not get very good ratings, let alone a slew of Emmy awards. Instead, the season ends with you questioning whether Carmy is once again running from goodness by threatening to leave the restaurant he founded and all the people there he loves. It may turn out that Carmy makes yet another huge mistake.

Mistakes Happen to Us All, Perfectionists Included

And you know what? He probably will. And so will I. I don’t know you, but I bet you will too if you are a perfectionist. Because perfectionism doesn’t leave us easily and for some of us it may never leave entirely. I’ll have to wait for Season 5 to know how it turns out for Carmy, just like I must wait for retrospection to arrive to know if my life choices were really the product of perfectionism. I’m going to keep rooting for Carmy, though, and hope he can learn that mediocrity is sometimes amazing, flaws are opportunities for connection, and you can learn to be okay with peace.

Until then, if you find yourself sitting at a table somewhere with only mistakes rolling around in your head, I hope a friend comes up and asks you what you are thinking about. I hope even more that you do what Carmy did and tell the truth even if all you can muster is a single word.


Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, A New Year’s Present, to learn about mindfulness from a heartwarming story. For a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days, try How to Be a Badass Lawyer. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.

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Mindfulness and Business Development for Lawyers

Image from Episode 511 of Be That Lawyer Podcast where I discuss mindfulness and business development for lawyers

Most of the time, when people talk about mindfulness and law practice they talk about the stress of dealing with our cases. This is true for me, but one additional stressor for many lawyers is business development.

Over the years, I have come to enjoy business development. Now, I think it’s fun.

Some Lawyers Struggle with Business Development

Years ago, though, I really struggled networking and business development. I was convinced I couldn’t do it because I was an introvert and not a natural salesperson. Mindfulness practice has helped me make peace with business development, largely because it helped me make peace with myself.

I got to talk about this journey on a new episode of the BE THAT LAWYER podcast with Steve Fretzin. Steve if a business development coach and consultant. He helps lawyers make the whole process less painful and more effective.

About the Podcast and Episode

On his podcast and in his latest book, he shares the stories of lawyers who have found success with business development. If business development makes you nervous, if you worry about losing your soul or feeling inauthentic trying to sell, Steve is a good person to listen to and this episode is for you.

Ultimately, I think business development is about building relationships and offering value to the your community. I think this idea comes through well in the episode. It also shares some insights about how mindfulness practices can support it.

How Can Mindfulness Help with Business Development?

As Steve and I discuss in interview, mindfulness practices can support business development in a number of ways.

Where to Find the Podcast Episode

If you want to learn more about mindfulness and business development for lawyers, check out the interview. Here are several options for how you can do.

You can listen to the Be That Lawyer podcast here: Website | Apple Podcasts | Spotify.

You can also watch the episode on YouTube here:


Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, A New Year’s Present, to learn about mindfulness from a heartwarming story. For a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days, try How to Be a Badass Lawyer. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.

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Balance Isn’t What You Add—It’s What You Live By

Cover image for post entitled "Balance isn't what you add- it's what you live by" with picture of guest poster Moshe Indig

Everyone thinks they’ll find balance after. After the LSAT. After admissions. After 1L. After biglaw. After they’ve proven something.

But that’s not how this works.

Balance isn’t the thing you reward yourself with once the chaos is over. Balance is the thing that prevents the chaos from defining you in the first place.

And if you don’t build around it from day one, you don’t “lose” balance. You forget what it ever felt like. You start confusing urgency for importance, burnout for ambition, and ego management for purpose.

Law Will Eat Whatever You Feed It.

Here’s the thing nobody tells you: law has no off switch.

It doesn’t say “thanks, that’s enough.” It takes whatever you give it—your time, your identity, your weekends, your inner monologue—and then
it asks for more.

And in the beginning, that won’t bother you. Because you’ll feel focused. Serious. In control. Like you’re becoming the kind of person who “gets things done.”

But fast-forward six months, or six years, and you’ll find yourself living in a schedule that you didn’t design, speaking in a tone you didn’t choose, and wondering when exactly you started measuring your worth by output.

By then, it won’t feel like a choice. Because the system will have made itself feel inevitable.

Work-Life Balance Is a Lie. Try Life-Work Clarity.

“Work-life balance” suggests that work comes first—and you try to squeeze life around the edges. That’s the default framing in this profession. It’s the water everyone’s swimming in.

But if you keep that frame, you lose the plot. You end up designing your life around a job that was never meant to be your identity.

Let me be blunt:
Law school is not your life.
Being a lawyer is not your life.

Your rank, your GPA, your offer letter—they’re not your center. They’re orbiting objects. And if you confuse them for your anchor, you will drift.

What I teach my students—whether they’re writing a personal statement or rethinking their entire path—is this: your life is the primary text. Everything else is just annotation.

Image with quote from post that says "Balance isn't what you escape to. It's what prevents the chaos from defining you."

Your Nervous System Will Outlast Your Resume

You can get into a T14 by white-knuckling your way through the LSAT.
You can get biglaw by sacrificing your body to the job. You can impress professors, mentors, hiring committees—by bending yourself into whatever shape they expect.

But eventually, the bill comes due. In your joints. Your breath. Your friendships. The way you sleep. The way you speak to yourself when no
one’s around
.

And no job title is worth that. Balance isn’t luxury. It’s protection.

It’s not about spa days or Sundays off. It’s about building a rhythm that doesn’t collapse when the pressure spikes. It’s about becoming someone who doesn’t need to “escape” their own life to feel okay.

Design the Balance Before the System Designs You

You need a structure that protects your time before law school starts—not after. You need to know what hours are yours. What thoughts are yours. What parts of your identity aren’t up for negotiation.

You need:

  • Mornings that belong to you, not your inbox.
  • A body that isn’t treated like a taxi for your brain.
  • Relationships that don’t just tolerate your goals—but remind you who you were before them.

If you don’t set that rhythm early, the default will become your design. And once you’ve built your ego on that design, it’s much harder to undo.

Final Truth: Law Doesn’t Deserve Your Life. You Do.

You don’t get extra credit for martyrdom. You don’t get a medal for disappearing into the system. You get a life—or you don’t.
Law can be a meaningful part of that life.

But only if you’re still in the driver’s seat. Only if balance isn’t an afterthought, but the foundation.

You are not here to survive law school. You’re here to live a life you’re proud of—one that law fits into, not one it consumes. The time to start thinking about that is now.


Author bio: Moshe Indig is the founder of Sharper Statements, a premier law school admissions consulting firm known for its depth, strategy, and results. A former litigator, Moshe helps aspiring lawyers craft powerful
narratives that reflect both who they are and where they’re headed—without sacrificing voice, clarity, or balance. Drawing from years of experience inside and outside the legal system, he teaches applicants to
center precision and authenticity in every part of the process. Read more at sharperstatements.com.


Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, A New Year’s Present, to learn about mindfulness from a heartwarming story. For a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days, try How to Be a Badass Lawyer. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.

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Mindfulness Events for Lawyers This Summer

Image for blog post entitled "Mindfulness Events for Lawyers This Summer"

Summer tends to be a slower time for me as a lawyer. As a mindfulness teacher, though, my summer is pretty exciting. I am thrilled to have to wonderful events regarding mindfulness for lawyers coming this July.

Keep reading to learn the details for both and find ways to participate.

Anger Management CLE for Lawyers in Pennsylvania

Image with details of CLE entitled "Understanding Anger: Mindfulness Strategies for Lawyers" which is discussed in the post

On July 16th at 10 AM, I will be offering a virtual CLE for the Pennsylvania Bar Institute on anger management for lawyers. Mindfulness is a powerful tool that can help lawyers manage and care for our emotions. Anger is no exception.

As I have written before, mindfulness practices can help lawyers and others to understand and navigate anger better. This is an essential skill for lawyers who frequently encounter anger, in themselves and others, in our cases.

This webinar is available virtually through the Pennsylvania Bar Institute but CLE credit may be available in other states as well. You can watch on-demand here.

Mindfulness in Law Society Retreat and Conference

Image sharing details of the Mindfulness in Law Society Virtual Retreat

The following week, I am flying out to San Francisco to hang out with some of my friends at the Mindfulness in Law Society. I will be speaking at and attending the 2025 Mindfulness in Law Society Conference and Retreat in San Francisco.

This is a wonderful opportunity to participate in and build community with other lawyers who practice mindfulness. The first day will include a conference and CLE presentations at the University of San Francisco. I will be participating in a panel discussion during the conference regarding mindfulness in law practice.

The second day will include a retreat at Spirit Rock Meditation Center. Spirit Rock is a beautiful facility founded by some of the most well-known meditation teachers in the United States. This day will be an opportunity to practice mindfulness with other lawyers in community.

To participate, register for both the conference and retreat separately at the links provided above.

This Will Be a Great Summer for Mindfulness in Law

I hope to see you or maybe even meet you at these events. If you cannot attend, the MILS Virtual Sits happen twice a week and are another great option for lawyers and others in the legal profession. Keep checking my events page for more opportunities to practice and learn about mindfulness.


Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, A New Year’s Present, to learn about mindfulness from a heartwarming story. For a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days, try How to Be a Badass Lawyer. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.

Like this post? Subscribe to the blog here or follow us on social media:

Why Self-Compassion Is Key to Managing Anger

Image of woman experiencing anger  with title of blog post that says "Why Self-Compassion Is Key to Managing Anger"

Whenever I get the chance, I talk about self-compassion. It is one of the biggest and most beneficial changes I have made over the course of my life. As a lawyer, it is essential to help me manage the stresses and challenges of law practice. The other day, though, a friend reminded me of yet another reason. Self-compassion can help with anger.

I teach about self-compassion all the time, but it was honestly nice to be reminded of this fact. For one thing, it was good timing because I am preparing to present a CLE on anger management for lawyers. In addition, self-compassion is not always easy to practice, so it was nice to remember yet another benefit of this trait.

The Relationship Between Self-Compassion and Anger

The friend who told me about the positive impact self-compassion can have on anger is another mindfulness teacher. I didn’t doubt her memory, but I wanted to confirm for myself. As a result, I visited researcher, Kristin Neff’s, website to see what I could find.

In a quick search, I found at least 3 studies that confirmed that self-compassion indeed had an impact on anger. These included the following studies showing that:

These are just a few examples, but all of these studies reveal that my friend was right. Indeed, self-compassion has an impact on anger and how we process it.

How Are Self-Compassion and Anger Related?

If you read any of the studies above, you may get some insights about the way that self-compassion can help us navigate and let go of anger. As a mindfulness teacher and someone who has historically struggled with anger, I have seen exactly how the two things are related.

Here are just a few ways that I believe self-compassion has helped me to be a less angry person.

  • I practice anger and judgment less. This means I disrupt the habitual anger reaction. Instead, I have replaced it (most of the time) with remembering common humanity.
  • I allow my feelings more and block them less. It took years but quite literally I have learned to let myself feel my emotions. This has created clarity about what matters and what doesn’t.
  • I focus more on honoring my own needs. When I meet my needs more, I feel better and don’t feel angry as much.
  • I accept my own limitations with more kindness. Constantly striving for perfection creates a lot of frustration. Wisdom around personal limits helps avoid this.
  • All of these things help me see others with kinder and gentler eyes. When I accept how I feel and what I need, I remember more often the humanity of other people.
Image showing 3 examples of research-proven benefits of self-compassion in relation to anger

Why Should Lawyers and Professionals or Anyone Else Care?

This one is obvious to most lawyers. Anger is a constant and frequent threat for us, just like it is for many business professionals. Our jobs often entail stress, time constraints, and conflict. This is a breeding ground for anger in and of itself.

In addition, as I have written before, anger and judgment are strongly correlated. Nothing will create an anger reaction more than the perception that someone has broken the rules or invaded a personal boundary. This kind of analysis is a lawyer’s stock and trade. To some degree, this means that many lawyers and other professionals practice anger every day at work.

As a result, the fact that self-compassion can help us manage or reduce anger may be a lifeline that many lawyers need. Even though anger sometimes feels good, it is volatile and can easily lead to bad results at work. It can lead to even more dire health consequences, including adverse impacts on our sleep as well as cardiac, immune, and digestive systems.

Easy Ways to Begin Exploring Self-Compassion Even If You Are Unsure about It

Despite the promising research, many people remain skeptical or unsure about cultivating self-compassion. Even though research exists to the contrary, they may be concerned that self-compassion will make them weak. In addition, they may be concerned that they can never change, even though countless studies demonstrate that self-compassion can be cultivated.

If this is you, I encourage you to first be self-compassionate towards yourself by not pushing too far. You don’t have to change your mind right away. All of those fears are normal and besides change takes time.

If you want to explore self-compassion more deeply, including to help you manage anger, I hope this list of resources will help:

If You Want to Be Angry Less, Try Self-Compassion

Anger is a human emotion that happens to us all. Though we should not strive to never be angry in life, many lawyers and professionals may need help managing it. If you have a busy, stressful, or conflict-heavy job, you may need to pay extra attention to the role that anger plays in your life and work. The good news is that self-compassion is a trait you can cultivate with simple practices over time. If you give them a try, you may help yourself build a happier, healthier, and less angry life.


Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, A New Year’s Present, to learn about mindfulness from a heartwarming story. For a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days, try How to Be a Badass Lawyer. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.

Like this post? Subscribe to the blog here or follow us on social media:

The Connection Between Mindfulness and Personal Boundaries

Blog post of women talking with title of blog post "The Connection Between Mindfulness and Personal Boundaries"

“Can you talk about setting boundaries?” I got this question during a presentation about mindfulness and compassion for a law firm last week. Though I did my best to answer it, this topic is one that took more time than I had during a webinar. As a result, the question stayed with me long after the presentation ended.

Boundaries are tough for many of us. They are especially challenging for lawyers and others in service professions. My answer when the question was presented to me was that mindfulness and compassion can definitely help with this. In this article, though, I will explain in more detail precisely how.

The Ways that Mindfulness Helps with Boundaries

Boundary setting sounds like a single-step process but it truly has multiple aspects. This means that our ability to set boundaries may require us to execute more than one task successfully. The other problem with boundaries is that they are by definition individualized. We can’t simply copy other people. Instead, we must learn through life experience what our needs are and how to ensure that they are met.

This is why mindfulness and compassion can help us set boundaries in the following ways:

  1. Supporting us in identifying personal needs;
  2. Helping us to explore the concept of interconnection;
  3. Cultivating clarity about what kindness and compassion truly are; and
  4. Building skill with being uncomfortable.

I’ll explain each one below in more detail.

1. Mindfulness and Identifying Needs

One of the reasons that boundaries can be hard to set is that we may be in the habit of overlooking our own needs. This is not a criticism but an observation of life. Lots of us are busy. Lawyers, caregivers, and others in service industries may be accustomed to focusing on the needs of others. For these reasons, it is quite easy to just not notice what you need.

Mindfulness practices can be transformational for this basic reason. The practices force you, at least for a few minutes, to check in with yourself. Inherently, meditation or other practices like yoga include noticing what’s in your mind, heart, and body. This clarity about your thoughts, feelings, and emotions is a foundational step to help you identify needs so that you can set boundaries.

2. Mindfulness of Interconnection

We live in a highly individualistic culture, so many people can get the idea that setting boundaries is about focusing only on themselves. I think this is a mistake for a practical reason. Despite the constant encouragement to think about ourselves, humans are social animals. We live in and depend on community to live happy and productive lives.

Mindfulness practices can help us get clarity about our rightful role in the world. As we pay attention to our own minds, bodies, and hearts, it is nearly impossible to avoid the social situations in which our feelings, thoughts, and emotions arise. Over time, this helps us see how connected we are to others.

When we pay attention to this interconnectedness, we build wisdom about the importance of honoring all human needs, including our own. Paying closer attention to these connections may also help us better understand what our essential needs truly are. Over time, this may help us develop more balance in navigating our own boundaries in relationship to others.

Image listing the four ways that mindfulness and compassion can help with setting personal boundaries that are shared in the blog post

3. True Compassion Respects Boundaries

Some people struggle with setting personal boundaries because they may think it seems selfish. Others may have the idea that kindness and self-sacrifice are synonymous. Regular mindfulness and compassion practice help us see that neither are really true.

As I have shared before, a regular mindfulness practice should include the four heart practices, including kindness and compassion. If you do these practices regularly, you will build clarity about what kindness and compassion truly are. Kindness isn’t meekness or consistently denying oneself. Compassion is not merely sacrificing oneself for others.

Instead, both of these traits and responses are premised on the idea that all people, including yourself, deserve to be healthy, safe, happy, and at peace. If you practice long enough, you will likely see that kindness and compassion flow much more easily and robustly when your own needs are met. In this way, practicing mindfulness may help you internalize the idea that compassion and kindness for others are compatible with and supported by setting personal boundaries.

4. Setting Boundaries Can Be Uncomfortable but Mindfulness Helps with That

Another practical thing that keeps many of us from setting good boundaries: it’s uncomfortable. Most of us, especially lawyers and others in service professions, don’t like to tell other people no. It can cause conflict. We may worry it will cause others to judge us. At a minimum, it can make us feel awkward and unsure.

This good news is that mindfulness practice can help with that. The bad news is that mindfulness helps because it often includes being uncomfortable. Most of us don’t want to sit quietly and watch our thoughts. Most of us don’t want to avoid moving when we have an itch on our arm. We don’t want to persist when our backs hurt or we are falling asleep or our minds won’t shut up.

When we can persist with these challenges, though, it builds patience, courage, and the skill of being with discomfort. Though I emphasize gradualism and self-kindness at all stages of meditation, I am the first to say that these skills are invaluable. If you can sit in meditation for a few minutes with a difficult thought or uncomfortable sensation, this means you can face the same things when they arise in a conversation about boundaries.

Conclusion: Mindfulness Builds the Skills We Need to Set Boundaries Effectively

In short, mindfulness and compassion practices help with setting boundaries because they cultivate some of the fundamental skills necessary for doing so. These include, identifying personal needs, clarity about kindness and our role in community, and the ability to handle discomfort. Of course, setting boundaries is something that we cannot do with meditation alone. With time, though, mindfulness practice can help us bring these traits into our lives so that we can set personal boundaries more effectively.


Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, A New Year’s Present, to learn about mindfulness from a heartwarming story. For a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days, try How to Be a Badass Lawyer. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.

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Book Review: The Joy of Movement by Kelly McGonigal

Image of happy women doing group fitness with title of the blog post "Book Review: The Joy of Movement by Kelly McGonigal"

This was not always true, but I am now one of those people who cannot stand to go a day without exercise. A few years ago, I would have found this comment annoying. Over the course of time, though, I found a way to prioritize movement each day. Now, I don’t just enjoy exercise. I need it to feel physically good and to support my mental health.

The Joy of Movement Is Not Just Another Fitness Book

If you think this sounds like an artless humble brag, then you might want to read The Joy of Movement by Kelly McGonigal (paid link). This book explains why movement is so essential to our well-being. It’s not a self-help book that tries to identify the “best” way to get fit or maximize calories burned.

Instead, The Joy of Movement is truly about the joy that moving can inspire in us as humans. The short book is composed of 7 chapters that each explain a different concept relating to movement. Most of the book discusses various exercise modalities, but other activities are covered as well.

About the Author, Kelly McGonigal

As I have written before, Kelly McGonigal is one of my favorite wellness authors. She’s a psychologist at Stanford and the author of other great books, including The Science of Compassion, and The Upside of Stress. As she explains in The Joy of Movement, McGonigal is also a fitness fanatic. She wrote the book in part to explain where her love of exercise originated.

This quest inexorably leads to a scientific analysis of the impact of movement on the body. McGonigal provides scholarly analysis on that subject in The Joy of Movement. But she also goes one step further. The book doesn’t just talk about cardiovascular and bodily benefits that arise from movement. It explains how movement offers us mental health, emotional, social, and even spiritual benefits.

The Joy of Movement Is Not Just a Science Book Either

In truth, though, McGonigal does not merely explain these benefits at all. Rather, she illustrates them with well-told stories. This is one of the reasons why I like McGonigal’s work so much. Her books do not merely cite studies or discuss concepts. She demonstrates the truth of the studies with stories.

For example, in The Joy of Movement, McGonigal explains the connection between the mythic “runner’s high” and our evolution from a hunter gatherer society. She examines popular fitness programs, including Orange Theory, Soul Cycle, and Peloton to explain how movement encourages social connection. And she shares stories of how real life people use exercise to build self-confidence, move past grief, or become more engaged in their communities.

A Health Book That Inspires Enthusiasm Rather Than Guilt or Shame

Most of us understand that exercise is good for us. Unfortunately, though, that message often inspires guilt, apathy, or even shame because it often comes with hidden pressure. Many discussions of exercise are linked, whether intentionally or not, to diet and fitness.

Those are certainly important, but I have learned that joy is a much better motivator than a “should.” In The Joy of Movement, McGonigal does not nag or scold. She does not emphasize health in the strict sense or longevity. And she does not waste time arguing about what form of movement is best for burning fat or calories or building muscle.

Image with a quote from the book review of The Joy of Movement as shared in the final paragraph of the blog post

How Movement and Joy Are Connected

Instead, as the title suggests, McGonigal’s goal is to help us see how movement cultivates joy in individuals and supports communities. If you read The Joy of Movement, you might think that you should start exercising again but only because it will remind you how awesome it feels.

In truth, The Joy of Movement is a book that feels good to read. It shares essential information about the human body and mind from an author with sufficient training to explain the concepts well. The book also shares stories that exemplify how good, generous, resilient, and kind the human race can be when it at its best.

The Joy of Movement Is a Great Read

If you read the book, though, it will be hard to forget that movement in its many forms is an important part of being at our best as humans. Whether you are a fitness fanatic or a reluctant runner, rower, or whatever, The Joy of Movement by Kelly McGonigal is a great read. It may motivate you to start or keep exercising or help you understand why you never want to stop. Even more importantly, it will help you explore how to live a joyful life.


Founder’s Note: The link to the book mentioned in this review is an affiliate link. The review is unsponsored and sincere but the link to Amazon is paid.


Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, A New Year’s Present, to learn about mindfulness from a heartwarming story. For a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days, try How to Be a Badass Lawyer. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.

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Managing Sleepiness in Your Meditation Practice

Image of sleepy woman trying to meditate with title from blog post "Managing Sleepiness in Your Meditation Practice"

Most people who meditate long enough will eventually face the problem of sleepiness. For those new to practice, it can actually be a good a sign. Sleepiness can signify that the body and mind are relaxing, which is a good thing.

Severe or persistent drowsiness, though, can create some problems. You can’t cultivate mindfulness or compassion in meditation if you can’t stay awake. I have been dealing with sleepiness a lot lately. In fact, I just went on a seven-day retreat and sleepiness was my biggest challenge.

Here are the things that I learned on retreat that helped me deal with sleepiness in meditation.

1. Identify the early signs of sleepiness.

Once full on sleepiness sets in, it can be nearly impossible to correct it. That’s why it helps to identify your early signs of sleepiness. These can be subtle, so it may take some trial and error. Even so, sleepiness happens at some point for all of us. This means that you are bound to get plenty of time to practice this.

The early signs of sleepiness may vary for us all. For me, though, I notice a lack of energy, tired eyes, and a general droopiness in my body. My shoulders might slump and my head might lean forward ever so slightly. If I am clear enough, I usually also notice mental haziness.

One of the clearest signs is a subtle ripple of energy that starts in my face and radiates down my body. When I notice this, it is like an alarm that tells me to immediately take some of the actions identified next to wake up.

2. Ways to Wake Yourself Up.

When you feel sleepiness come on, one or a combination of these steps may help you wake up.

1. Remove your sweater or blanket.

Temperature control is huge for meditation. To avoid sleepiness, a slightly cool room is ideal. Removing your sweater or blanket to cool your body down may help you wake up.

2. Sit or stand up.

It can be hard or even awkward at times to move during meditation. Sometimes it is the right call. If you are falling asleep when you practice, sitting or standing up can help. Walking meditation is always an option if you need movement to raise your energy levels.

3. Lift Your Head.

This one is subtle, but sometimes sleepiness happens because we unwittingly let our heads bow. This can block our airways slightly and may simulate our experience during sleep. Raising your head so your eyes are level with the horizon may clear your airway and wake you up.

4. Open Your Eyes

What do all sleeping people hate the most? They hate it when you turn on the lights. If sleepiness comes when you meditate, open your eyes. You may also consider practicing in a room with some light to keep yourself alert during practice.

5. Try breathwork

Many people think that the breath calms us down, but this isn’t totally true. It can also energize us. Focusing on the inhale during meditation may offer more energy. Using a pranayama technique briefly, like box breath, may force your mind to get active and wake you up.

6. Connect with Your Intention

Sleepiness in meditation is hard. It would feel so good to just succumb to the siren call of the impromptu power nap. Struggling through that temptation is rough. When this happens to me, I recall my intention for practice. I meditate daily precisely for moments like these. I want to build skills for navigating inner challenges with more grace and kindness. Remembering this usually helps me focus and wake up.

7. Shift to a more active style of practice.

I recommend keeping your daily meditation practice very simple, but it also helps to have a few options at your disposal. One reason is that some meditation styles are more active than others. Open awareness practice or even breath focus may induce relaxation and eventually sleepiness. Something more active, like body scan, noting practice, or even one of the heart practices may energize your mind and body.

Image listing 7 ways to handle sleepiness in meditation that were shared in the blog post

3. Be Sure that You Aren’t Unconsciously Causing or Just Ignoring Sleepiness.

If you have tried all the strategies above and sleepiness persists, you may need to dig dipper. Ask yourself the following questions if drowsiness continues when you meditate.

A. Are You Sleeping Enough?

Most Americans do not get enough sleep. This is specifically true for lawyers as well. There are many reasons for this but the pervasiveness of screens is a common culprit. If you can’t stay awake during meditation, it is worth asking yourself if you just need some rest. Focusing on quality sleep will improve your meditation practice and overall health.

B. Are You Trying too Hard?

Another common problem for many professionals, especially lawyers, is unconscious overwork. Some of us may habitually try hard. We may be so used to striving that we do it in meditation. This may be true even after years of practice and instruction that reminds us to avoid striving.

Trying too hard can induce sleepiness for the simple reason that it wears our minds out. While sleepiness may be a sign indicating a need for more focus, it can also indicate a need to relax too. You can do this by bringing in an attitude of play and lightness into practice. You can also try giving yourself breaks in practice by shifting the practice type or taking small breaks within your practice.

C. Is there an underlying medical condition you should explore?

Sometimes sleepiness can be a sign of an underlying medical or mental health condition. If the sleepiness persists despite interventions, it may be time to talk to your care provider. Meditation is just one means of taking care of ourselves. A doctor or mental health care provider can help you ensure that all of your needs are met.

4. Learn about Acceptance and Self-Compassion.

Even if you do all the things right, the odds are that sleepiness still may happen during meditation. Meditation is not about controlling your body or your mind. Instead, it’s about learning to work with your body and your mind better.

As discussed above, sleepiness in meditation gives you a chance to see what strategies energize and deplete you. When all those fail, though, sleepiness can give you a chance to practice something arguably more important. It can give you a reason to practice acceptance and self-compassion.

You can’t always be energized. You can’t always be “on.” Your mind does not always want to focus. Your body may not always want to sit. Practicing self-kindness in the midst of this lack of control is part of meditation. Though I know exactly how frustrating this can feel, I can also say that this life skill is very helpful to have.

Conclusion

Fatigue or drowsiness during meditation is a very human thing. It does not mean that you are a bad meditator or the practice isn’t right for you. Instead, sleepiness is a normal challenge for most meditators. Learning to manage sleepiness in meditation can build skills and teach you about yourself.


To deal with problems in meditation practice, including sleepiness, check out the Pause and Begin Again ebook. This free resource offers tips for starting and restarting a meditation practice and facing common challenges.


Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, A New Year’s Present, to learn about mindfulness from a heartwarming story. For a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days, try How to Be a Badass Lawyer. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.

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