Tips for Starting a Meditation Practice in the New Year

Image of lawyer meditating in a group with the title of the blog post "Tips for Starting a Meditation Practice in the New Year"

It’s the beginning of a new year, so lawyers may be thinking about new years goals and resolutions. For many people, this might include the goal of exploring mindfulness or starting a meditation practice.

If this is your intention for the year, I think it’s a great one. But all of us know that noble intentions in January sometimes fade by February. How can you start a meditation practice in January that has the hope of lasting the year and beyond?

That’s why I wrote this piece. In this post, I will share some tips intended to help you explore meditation and turn it into a real practice.

Establish Meditation as a Habit

My first advice for lawyers exploring meditation is to start small. That isn’t only because it’s kinder to yourself. It’s also much easier to do something repeatedly if it takes less time.

The biggest problem many lawyers and professional have with meditation is finding the time to practice. Given this, it is essential to not overwhelm yourself at the beginning.

I started my meditation practice over a decade ago at 1 minute per day because that is all I could handle. Though I was quickly able to add minutes on as the days went by, this small increment of time meant I had very few excuses to skip practice.

This meant that I quickly established a habit of meditating every day. If you want the benefits of meditation, making the practice regular is important. To do this, start with short sessions but aim for regular, ideally daily, practice. If you need any more help on brainstorming meditation as a habit, download this free worksheet.

Focus on Building Skills Instead of Being “Perfect” at Meditation

Now, you may be worried that even if you make meditation a habit, you still don’t know what you are doing. So you may be worried about doing the practice wrong or wasting your time.

I have shared basic meditation instructions on this blog and posts about a variety of different meditation practices, including breath practice, body scan, joy, and loving-kindness. At the beginning, though, I would not worry so much about being right in meditation.

Of course, no lawyer wants to waste their time. But the mistakes in meditation are often the best teachers. Meditation is not a thought exercise. It is an experiential practice. You learn how to do the practice by meditating.

At the beginning, then, the object is not to be perfect but instead to cultivate some basic skills. These include the following:

  • Patience with yourself;
  • Focus (including which focal point works for you);
  • Learning what calms and soothes you;
  • Connecting with bodily sensations;
  • Noticing when you are thinking;
  • Redirecting attention; and
  • Self-kindness.
Image of author Claire E. Parsons with quote from post "Of course, no lawyer wants to waste their time. But the mistakes in meditation are often the best teachers. Meditation is not a thought exercise. It is an experiential practice. You learn how to do the practice by meditating."

Don’t Expect to See Quick Progress in Meditation

Many lawyers start a meditation practice because they want the benefits they have read about in research studies. They want to feel less stress, they want to be able to focus on demand, and they want more happiness and kindness.

Then they sit down in meditation and they feel stressed because they can’t focus. They feel tired and bored. Their feet fall asleep, their knees and back hurt. All of this is bound to make any reasonable lawyer think the practice doesn’t work.

But here’s the thing: the benefits of meditation often don’t show up in the practice itself, at least not right away. After a while, practice should come to feel a bit more enjoyable and soothing in itself. At first, though, you are still building skills. Expecting to see mastery in your practice is like expecting not to struggle at all when you start a new exercise routine.

This means that you should give yourself some time (four to eight weeks) before you look for any benefits to emerge. And if those benefits emerge, they probably will show up outside of meditation first. These might include things like rushing less, a reduction in the physical signs of stress, or less reactivity.

Though benefits very likely will emerge with consistent meditation practice, be cautious about your expectations. Don’t expect immediate results and look for the benefits in life first before they show up in meditation practice.

Keep Your Practice Simple

One of the problems that knowledge seekers like lawyers may encounter at first is that they can’t decide which mindfulness practice to explore. The list of skills mentioned above may suggest that you must master all forms of meditation in order to gain benefits. Allow me to set the record straight.

While it is great to explore a variety of practices, ultimately simplicity is ideal. Keeping your practice simple will reduce decision fatigue. This means that there is less chance that your actual practice time will be delayed or derailed by too many planning questions.

Over the years, I have done a variety of practices with and without guiding. Eventually, though, I settled into a simple routine that consists mostly of breath focus practice, open awareness, and loving-kindness. I generally don’t do formal body scan practices, but I enjoy them on occasion if I have a special need to relax or calm my body.

Based on this, it is great to explore and shop around with practices at first. After a few days or weeks, though, it is best to settle on the practice that allows you to relax and focus the most. This will allow you time to build proficiency with the practice, so that you can experience benefits and build confidence.

As the months and years go on, you can always adjust your practice. In fact, you may need to do so to address specific issues like increased stress, sleepiness or spacing out, or just to refresh your practice.

Image sharing five tips for lawyers starting a meditation practice as shared in the blog post

Don’t Go It Alone

I offer my last bit of advice with a strong sense of humility. When I started meditating, I practiced totally on my own. I had no teacher or community and at first hid my practice from my family.

It was not until years later that I realized the error in this approach. When I attended my first retreat, I was amazed at how supportive it was to meditate with other people. I couldn’t believe how helpful a few minutes of chatting with a teacher was.

Though many lawyers pride ourselves for our independence, we do best when we remember that humans are social animals. When we humans want to make real habit change, social support is the way to go. If you want to make meditation a lasting part of your life, finding a teacher or community should be a priority.

Now, as I said above, time is often a challenge for lawyers. I am no stranger to this. To be sure, meditation can be learned and practiced on your own and you should not feel ashamed at all about that. If, however, you have any options to meditate in a group, learned from a trained mindfulness teacher, or go on retreat, it will support your practice.

For anyone in the legal profession looking for such a community, the Mindfulness in Law Society provides a highly accessible option.

Conclusion

These are my tips for starting a meditation practice in the new year. They are offered to help busy people like lawyers be kind to themselves while forming a habit that can last. Regardless of the goals you set, I wish you luck in the new year and hope you find whatever practices support you and your community best.


Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, How to Be a Badass Lawyer, for a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.

Like this post? Subscribe to the blog here or follow us on social media:

Five Tips for Mindful Walking to Enhance Well-Being

Image of woman walking in a park with title of blog post "Five Tips for Mindful Walking to Enhance Well-Being"

Unintentionally over the last several months, I formed a nice self-care habit. Whenever I have time, I take a mindful walk after dinner. I wouldn’t call this walking meditation because it’s not quite so slow or focused. But I wouldn’t say it’s clearly outside of the realm of meditation either.

That’s because my mindful walking habit has become a real support for me. It helps me when my mind is busy, my spirits are low, or if I just need to move a little bit and enjoy a nice day.

If you want to try a making mindful walking part of your routine, this can tell you how. Here are the five key elements of a mindful walk.

1. Leave Your Phone at Home While Walking

This one is not a hard and fast rule. There’s no shame in using your phone for safety or to listen to a workout video or music to support your walk. Talking with a friend on your phone while you walk is also a great way to support a healthy habit.

If you don’t need it, though, I encourage you to leave your phone at home. One reason is that most of us are bombarded by screens in daily life. For that reason, taking a walk without your phone may feel really good. I leave my phone at home to avoid the temptation of looking at it and distracting myself from the walk.

In this way, the first way to to make your walk mindful is to leave your phone at home when you walk out the door.

2. Try Walking with No Destination

Another important thing to leave out of mindful walking is a destination. Sure, you can select a destination for a walk if you like, but it helps to leave the route open-ended.

Next time you walk somewhere, notice what happens when you walk with a destination. In my experience, having a set goal in mind means that the end location takes over. To really let the walk be about the journey, let the destination go.

If, like me, you don’t have the ability to walk “nowhere” easily, you can make this very simple. Pick the easiest two-way route you can and stick to that route. Over time, getting to your goal won’t be the thing; experiencing the walk will be the the most essential piece.

In short, if you want to take a mindful walk, it helps to let the destination go and just walk.

3. Take Your Time as You Walk

It should come as no surprise that the next aspect of mindful walking is slowing down. Most people these days rush through life. Most lawyers and professionals feel a constant state of time urgency.

One of the simplest things you can do to manage stress is to start to notice this tendency to rush. An easy way to do that is to start slowing down routine activities when you have the time. Most often, we walk for functional reasons and we forget how good it can feel to get outside and move.

It’s not necessary to move at a snail’s pace to make space for mindful awareness with walking. But it helps if you can move slowly enough that you feel like you are savoring the experience of walking. Next time you take a walk, try to consciously take your time and notice what a difference it makes.

Image of person walking in woods with overly of listing of five tips for mindful walking as shared in the blog post

4. Mindfully Observe Your Surroundings

I know that we all don’t live or work close to what most of us would call nature. We may live near busy streets or urban areas with lots of activity. Though natural spaces are ideal for mindful walking, they are not necessarily essential.

Mindfulness isn’t just about trying to achieve a peak state or perfectly calm state. Instead, it’s about awareness with things as they are. As you walk, pay attention to your surroundings. Notice all the sensations. If you can walk near a natural setting, take full advantage of it.

Sounds like water rushing and bird song are shown to lower stress levels because they signify safety. Whether I have nature sounds or not, paying attention to surroundings is great for mindful walking because it helps me reconnect with my body and get out of my thoughts.

5. Let the Thoughts Come and Go

Speaking of thoughts, my last tip is that you don’t have to fight them off during mindful walking. Inevitably as you walk, thoughts will arise. That’s no problem. It doesn’t mean you’ve failed at mindful walking. It just means you are human.

The good thing about thoughts when I am walking, though, is that it’s a bit harder to get sucked into them. When I walk, I am more in touch with my body because it is moving. There’s also a big wide world of space that makes any thoughts in my mind feel a little bit smaller.

Just as in meditation, you don’t have to clear your mind to take a mindful walk. Instead, with some time and patience, you can learn to let the thoughts come and go.

Give Mindful Walking a Try

Mindful walking can be a supportive way to get some movement, enjoy outdoors, reduce stress, and cultivate mindfulness. If you want to make mindful walking a habit, give these five tips a try.


Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, How to Be a Badass Lawyer, for a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.

Like this post? Subscribe to the blog here or follow us on social media:

Managing Sleepiness in Your Meditation Practice

Image of sleepy woman trying to meditate with title from blog post "Managing Sleepiness in Your Meditation Practice"

Most people who meditate long enough will eventually face the problem of sleepiness. For those new to practice, it can actually be a good a sign. Sleepiness can signify that the body and mind are relaxing, which is a good thing.

Severe or persistent drowsiness, though, can create some problems. You can’t cultivate mindfulness or compassion in meditation if you can’t stay awake. I have been dealing with sleepiness a lot lately. In fact, I just went on a seven-day retreat and sleepiness was my biggest challenge.

Here are the things that I learned on retreat that helped me deal with sleepiness in meditation.

1. Identify the early signs of sleepiness.

Once full on sleepiness sets in, it can be nearly impossible to correct it. That’s why it helps to identify your early signs of sleepiness. These can be subtle, so it may take some trial and error. Even so, sleepiness happens at some point for all of us. This means that you are bound to get plenty of time to practice this.

The early signs of sleepiness may vary for us all. For me, though, I notice a lack of energy, tired eyes, and a general droopiness in my body. My shoulders might slump and my head might lean forward ever so slightly. If I am clear enough, I usually also notice mental haziness.

One of the clearest signs is a subtle ripple of energy that starts in my face and radiates down my body. When I notice this, it is like an alarm that tells me to immediately take some of the actions identified next to wake up.

2. Ways to Wake Yourself Up.

When you feel sleepiness come on, one or a combination of these steps may help you wake up.

1. Remove your sweater or blanket.

Temperature control is huge for meditation. To avoid sleepiness, a slightly cool room is ideal. Removing your sweater or blanket to cool your body down may help you wake up.

2. Sit or stand up.

It can be hard or even awkward at times to move during meditation. Sometimes it is the right call. If you are falling asleep when you practice, sitting or standing up can help. Walking meditation is always an option if you need movement to raise your energy levels.

3. Lift Your Head.

This one is subtle, but sometimes sleepiness happens because we unwittingly let our heads bow. This can block our airways slightly and may simulate our experience during sleep. Raising your head so your eyes are level with the horizon may clear your airway and wake you up.

4. Open Your Eyes

What do all sleeping people hate the most? They hate it when you turn on the lights. If sleepiness comes when you meditate, open your eyes. You may also consider practicing in a room with some light to keep yourself alert during practice.

5. Try breathwork

Many people think that the breath calms us down, but this isn’t totally true. It can also energize us. Focusing on the inhale during meditation may offer more energy. Using a pranayama technique briefly, like box breath, may force your mind to get active and wake you up.

6. Connect with Your Intention

Sleepiness in meditation is hard. It would feel so good to just succumb to the siren call of the impromptu power nap. Struggling through that temptation is rough. When this happens to me, I recall my intention for practice. I meditate daily precisely for moments like these. I want to build skills for navigating inner challenges with more grace and kindness. Remembering this usually helps me focus and wake up.

7. Shift to a more active style of practice.

I recommend keeping your daily meditation practice very simple, but it also helps to have a few options at your disposal. One reason is that some meditation styles are more active than others. Open awareness practice or even breath focus may induce relaxation and eventually sleepiness. Something more active, like body scan, noting practice, or even one of the heart practices may energize your mind and body.

Image listing 7 ways to handle sleepiness in meditation that were shared in the blog post

3. Be Sure that You Aren’t Unconsciously Causing or Just Ignoring Sleepiness.

If you have tried all the strategies above and sleepiness persists, you may need to dig dipper. Ask yourself the following questions if drowsiness continues when you meditate.

A. Are You Sleeping Enough?

Most Americans do not get enough sleep. This is specifically true for lawyers as well. There are many reasons for this but the pervasiveness of screens is a common culprit. If you can’t stay awake during meditation, it is worth asking yourself if you just need some rest. Focusing on quality sleep will improve your meditation practice and overall health.

B. Are You Trying too Hard?

Another common problem for many professionals, especially lawyers, is unconscious overwork. Some of us may habitually try hard. We may be so used to striving that we do it in meditation. This may be true even after years of practice and instruction that reminds us to avoid striving.

Trying too hard can induce sleepiness for the simple reason that it wears our minds out. While sleepiness may be a sign indicating a need for more focus, it can also indicate a need to relax too. You can do this by bringing in an attitude of play and lightness into practice. You can also try giving yourself breaks in practice by shifting the practice type or taking small breaks within your practice.

C. Is there an underlying medical condition you should explore?

Sometimes sleepiness can be a sign of an underlying medical or mental health condition. If the sleepiness persists despite interventions, it may be time to talk to your care provider. Meditation is just one means of taking care of ourselves. A doctor or mental health care provider can help you ensure that all of your needs are met.

4. Learn about Acceptance and Self-Compassion.

Even if you do all the things right, the odds are that sleepiness still may happen during meditation. Meditation is not about controlling your body or your mind. Instead, it’s about learning to work with your body and your mind better.

As discussed above, sleepiness in meditation gives you a chance to see what strategies energize and deplete you. When all those fail, though, sleepiness can give you a chance to practice something arguably more important. It can give you a reason to practice acceptance and self-compassion.

You can’t always be energized. You can’t always be “on.” Your mind does not always want to focus. Your body may not always want to sit. Practicing self-kindness in the midst of this lack of control is part of meditation. Though I know exactly how frustrating this can feel, I can also say that this life skill is very helpful to have.

Conclusion

Fatigue or drowsiness during meditation is a very human thing. It does not mean that you are a bad meditator or the practice isn’t right for you. Instead, sleepiness is a normal challenge for most meditators. Learning to manage sleepiness in meditation can build skills and teach you about yourself.


To deal with problems in meditation practice, including sleepiness, check out the Pause and Begin Again ebook. This free resource offers tips for starting and restarting a meditation practice and facing common challenges.


Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, How to Be a Badass Lawyer, for a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.

Like this post? Subscribe to the blog here or follow us on social media:

Why Lawyers Need Mudita Practice for Greater Joy

Image of a woman showing appreciation with a title of the blog post "Why Lawyers Need Mudita Practice for Greater Joy"

As a writer and a lawyer, I love it when the sound of a word fits its meaning. “Mudita” is one of those words. It is a Pali and Sanskrit term that refers to sympathetic or appreciative joy. In Buddhist teachings, mudita is one of the four essential heart practices. This post will explain why it’s also essential for lawyers.

What Is Appreciative Joy or Mudita?

Mudita practice is about cultivating joy for the happiness of others. As one of the four heart practices, mudita supports the cultivation of kindness, equanimity, and compassion. As a meditation practice, mudita has a structure similar to loving-kindness. It involves bringing people and groups to mind and conveying kind wishes.

Because mudita focuses on the well-being of others, though, it is the one practice that does not start with oneself. Instead, typically, mudita starts with a loved one and mentor and then extends out to neutral and difficult people. This is because mudita practice, if you give it some time, is likely to create joy in you.

The phrases for mudita practice are also similar to those used for loving-kindness, but with slight edits. Instead of sending simple kindness and well-being, the phrases are tailored to evoke appreciate at the well-being of others. Some examples include:

  • May you be happy;
  • May your happiness continue;
  • May you appreciate your joy;
  • I am happy for your.

Benefits of Mudita Practice

I’ll talk more about why lawyers specifically might want to consider adding mudita practice to their routine below. As a general matter, practicing appreciative joy has many benefits. The most common reason that someone would want to practice mudita is to reduce self-centered thinking.

To a certain degree, most of us are self-centered. This is more of an observation than a criticism. Part of being human is the reality that our minds get stuck on ourselves. Individualism in western culture and technology don’t help this either.

These two things can combine to alienate us from others. They can also present the illusion that the happiness or success is a threat to us. Given this, even the best of us might need to get intentional about expanding our horizons. Mudita practice can help you reconnect with others and reconsider what real happiness is.

Image showing the benefits of mudita meditation practice for lawyers

Can You Train Yourself to Feel Joy for Others?

Now, you may wonder if you can really train yourself to feel authentic joy for other people. This is a fair question. Most of know that we can’t boss our emotions around.

Though this is true, mudita practice is not about forcing yourself to feel anything. Just like with loving-kindness, the practice is not about feeling joy on demand. Instead, it is better to think about mudita practice as one of orientation.

The point is to direct your attention and intention towards open-heartedness and generosity. You can’t and shouldn’t try to make yourself feel joy for someone else’s good fortune. But you can practice wishing people true happiness and see how it makes you feel.

At first, this practice is likely to feel awkward, strange, or like nothing at all. If you keep practicing, though, you may notice a shift. You may see that you can feel genuine happiness for others. And you may also see the circle of people you can feel happiness for can expand to include people you never expected.

Why Mudita Practice Is Good for Lawyers

Most busy people, like lawyers, are encouraged constantly to “make time for self-care.” This is because lawyers spend most of their work day thinking of others. Why should they want to spend time in meditation focusing on the well-being of others?

One reason is that, while lawyers are often serving others, they are not often intentionally practicing joy. Law practice is often embroiled in conflict and stress. As a result, redirecting attention to happiness and joy can feel pretty good.

In the same way, lawyers are often in competition with others. Some of us have literal opponents in litigation or a hostile transactional matter. It’s not uncommon for lawyers to feel a sense of competition for business reasons with other lawyers.

In this way, mudita might be a nice respite from the competition. It can remind us that our own success is not the only way for us to find happiness. In short, it can help us reflect on and literally feel that connection is our best source of joy.

Want to Try Mudita? Here’s a Guided Meditation.

If you are revved up about appreciative joy and want to try a mudita practice, you are in luck. You can try this practice here:

And if you want to try another option, you can check out this one I liked from One Mind Dharma.


Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, How to Be a Badass Lawyer, for a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.

Like this post? Subscribe to the blog here or follow us on social media:

Unlocking the Benefits of Open Awareness Meditation

Cover image for blog post of man meditating with title "Unlocking the Benefits of Open Awareness Meditation"

“Just sit there.” This was some of the best meditation advice I ever got. When my meditation practice was still young, a teacher gave me this instruction during an interview on a retreat. I had been doing breath focus practice for a while and explained that I was rushing back to the breath. Though I didn’t know the term then, my teacher suggested that I try open awareness or open monitoring meditation.

On the very next sit, that is what I did and I quickly fell in love. As I will explain in this post, open awareness meditation has some disadvantages. But for me the advantages were clear. I had honed focus pretty well, but I needed to learn to relax and let go. If this sounds familiar to you, keep reading. In this post, I will briefly explain what open awareness practice is. I will also tell you how to do it. Finally, I will show you how to embed it in your meditation practice.

What Is Open Awareness Meditation?

As the instructions from my teacher indicated, the beauty of open awareness practice is its simplicity. With this style, you drop all specific focal points and just sit there. The thing is, of course, that you don’t merely sit there. Instead, you sit there and pay attention to whatever comes up in your awareness.

This includes thoughts, sensations in the body, emotions, and external stimuli. In short, with open awareness meditation the practice is to note all of your awareness. Ideally, you will also do so with mental clarity but without judgment.

Image of woman meditating with google search bar asking "how to do open awareness meditation" which is explained in the blog post

Why You Should Try Open Awareness Meditation?

Many people assume that focus is the primary benefit of meditation. That can be true for many people, but I don’t think it is true for all. Many people, including lots of lawyers, may have pretty strong focus skills already. As I learned, though, meditation can also impart other important traits.

These include things like relaxing, letting go, non-judgment and kindness. Open awareness helps to cultivate these things in particular because the practice literally invites everything into awareness. Nothing is off limits. It’s all part of the practice. As you practice welcoming everything in experience into awareness, you build patience, flexibility, equanimity, and self-kindness.

Potential Benefits of Open Awareness Meditation

Because all of us are different, the potential benefits of open awareness meditation are varied. With that said, I quickly experienced more access to insight when I started open awareness meditation. I also noticed an increase in intuition and creativity. When I allowed space in my mind, I became clearer about my life and more receptive to my own ideas.

I also soon started to understand myself better because I started to see my patterns in real time. Instead of merely focusing on the breath, I could see familiar narratives arise and fade. By watching this play out, some of those stories lost their power. These included my tendency to doubt myself and to do everything on my own. This made room for new wholesome ones, like self-compassion and opening to creative pursuits like writing.

Image of man meditating with benefits of open awareness meditation, including patience, flexibility, equanimity, and creativity, listed as an overlay on the picture

How to Explore Open Awareness Meditation

If this sounds attractive, you may next wonder how you can start exploring open awareness meditation. As I already mentioned, the classic way to start this practice is to start just sitting. Let go of all focal points, broaden the scope of your awareness, and see what comes up. For people with some experience with meditation, this can be a great way to explore a new style of practice.

Some may worry that this openness can cause confusion. However, there are ways to expand awareness more gradually. One choice is to try a noting practice, in which you note things that arise in experience. You can also try practices that categorize experience, such as a practice that focuses on feeling tones (neutral, pleasant, unpleasant). Shinzen Young also has a style called “see-hear-feel” that categorizes the visual, auditory, and sensory experiences that arise.

Dealing with Disadvantages or Problems

Now, some people may worry that their mind isn’t automatically open or won’t stay open for this practice. The easy answer is that starting with open awareness practice is not necessary. You don’t need to begin with it in order to do it. Instead, you can begin a meditation session with breath focus. You could also use a body scan or a mantra. Then transition to open awareness. This is what I have done for years, though the time I need to spend settling with a focus practice has decreased over time.

You may worry that open awareness could lead to dullness. It might also cause spacing out. This is something that happens to the best of us. One way to tackle this is to manage sleepiness. Watch your temperature, practice at a good time of day, and don’t try to meditate after a big meal. Another solution is to bring back in elements of focus practice to support mental clarity when needed. For example, if you find yourself spacing out you can energize the mind with a focus practice.

Conclusion: Open Awareness Meditation Is a Practice to Try

In truth, though, you can’t learn open awareness meditation from reading about it in a blog post. I wrote this post to encourage you to consider and explore the practice. The best way to learn about open awareness meditation and what it can do for you is try it yourself. To that end, I give you the same advice my teacher gave me years ago. Set a timer. Find a quiet safe space. Just sit there. See what open awareness meditation can do for you.


Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, How to Be a Badass Lawyer, for a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.

Like this post? Subscribe to the blog here or follow us on social media:

What Is Body Scan Meditation and Why Should Lawyers Try It?

Blog post cover image with title "What is body scan meditation and why should lawyers try it?"

When people think of meditation, they typically think of the breath as the focal point. But in truth, meditation can use almost any focal point and the focal point doesn’t necessarily have to be a singular, stagnant object. One of the most beneficial practices that I incorporate in my routine is the body scan.

What Is Body Scan Meditation?

With this practice, the focus is on the sensations in the whole body, rather than exclusively focusing on the breath. Traditionally, this practice flows systemically through the body, flowing from one part or region of the body into the next.

Most commonly, body scan meditations start at the crown of the head and proceed down to other parts of the body until you reach the feet and toes. This is sometimes called a “top down” style of body scan.

There are a few reasons why teachers may commonly start the practice at the top of the head. It can be a trauma-informed risk mitigation strategy for those very new to practice, since trauma often affects the body. The theory here is that gradualism to cultivating body awareness is supportive to many students.

Similarly, starting at the top of the head may be a way to meet students where they are. This is because many of us new to mindfulness are accustomed to living life in our thoughts and brains.

Various Ways to Do a Body Scan.

There are, of course, many potential methods and starting points for body scans. For instance, you could start with the toes and work up or do a body scan that focuses on the chakras or plexuses along the spine.

Another way to start is by making a connection with your five senses and then branching out from there. Still other styles of practice, like yoga nidra, skip awareness from one body part to another rapidly. This can feel disorienting at first, but over time it may cause the mind to still and the body to relax.

Some body scan practices may also make use of progressive muscle relaxation, where one tenses the muscles and releases them. This is not required but can be a nice way to hasten relaxation or support the detection of body sensations if that is a challenge for you.

Regardless of the particular method you try, the object of a body scan meditation is to feel the sensations in the body and notice what you feel, rather than to think about the body.

Image of woman meditating with quote that says "body scan meditations typically start at the crown of the head and proceed down to other parts of the body"

Advantages of Body Scan Meditation.

Body scan meditation often feels more manageable to new meditators because the practice is more active than breath practice. Because the focus of body scan is to flow or cycle through sensations in the body, the mind has to work a bit more to stay focused on the sensations in the body. For this reason, it may not seem as hard to keep the mind engaged with the focal point as it does in the early phases of learning breath practice.

Even so, body scan builds focus, acceptance, and awareness like any other mindfulness practice. In this way, it can be a great alternative to breath-based practices if those present unique challenges for you.

In addition, in my experience, getting into the body is a great (perhaps the best) way to get out of your head. It is for this reason that resting in sensations during a body scan can be deeply relaxing even to new meditators and after relatively short periods of time.

Potential Challenges of Body Scan Meditation.

As mentioned above, body scan meditation can present some challenges. People with past trauma, whether diagnosed or not, should proceed gently and in small doses. Traumatic experiences can have lasting effects on the body even when we aren’t consciously aware of it. If you have concerns in this area, consult with a trauma-informed mindfulness teacher or your mental health support provider first.

Another challenge is that some people don’t feel much sensation when they do body scan. This can be normal for those new to the practice, since some of us may need some time to build awareness of bodily sensations. It also can be normal because there is a range of unique capacities when it comes to mindful awareness. If a lack of sensation is severe, chronic, or concerns you, though, you may talk to your doctor to ensure that your medical needs are being fully met.

Why Body Scan Meditation Is Great for Lawyers and Other Busy People

Body scan meditations are very useful for attorneys because they remind us to pay attention to and take care of our bodies. In law school, we learn to emphasize rationality in making decisions for our clients. While separating fact from emotion is critical, we lawyers are still human beings with human bodies.

To do our best for our clients, we need to understand and respect the limitations of our own bodies so we can fulfill our responsibility to our clients. As I’ve written before, emotions are sensations in the body, so body scan practices may also have the incidental benefit of building emotional intelligence and tolerance when powerful emotions arise.

Image of woman doing tree yoga pose on the beach with a quote that says "getting into the body is a great way to get out of your head"

Potential Benefits of Body Scan Meditation.

Even outside of emotions, however, the awareness that body scan practice engenders can have more fundamental benefits for lawyers and professionals. Some of the most common bodily issues that can impede us from doing our best work are represented in the acronym HALT, which stands for hungry, angry, lonely, tired. These symptoms are fundamental to the human condition, but in our fast-paced world it is easy to skip lunch, push our emotions to the side, miss out on social opportunities, and deprive ourselves of sleep.

Body scan meditations are excellent for lawyers because they remind us that we are not merely brains filled with legal strategy, but people who must be fed, rested, and cared for. If you practice body scan meditation, you will develop the skills to notice the symptoms of various conditions and emotions in your body in the early and more subtle stages before they get to the point where they affect your performance, outlook, or demeanor. These skills are not only necessary to performing our responsibilities as lawyers, but they are also beneficial for anyone who wants to be a top performer in a high-stakes environment.

Image with quote that says "emotions are feelings in the body" which you may experience if you do body scan meditation

Body Scan Meditation Can Be a Building Block for Mindfulness Cultivation.

Finally, body scan is building block to support further growth in your meditation practice or just when dealing with the difficulties of life. When you start a meditation practice, it can seem like the focal point is the object of practice. As your practice advances, you may learn, however, that the focal point is really a tool. In other words, the point of practice is not just to focus on the breath or the sensations of the body. It is, instead, to build the skill of resting with the breath or the body.

If you can learn to do this with body scan practice, then you have one more tool at your disposal when meditation or life throws you curveballs. For example, perhaps troubling thoughts or overwhelming emotions come up during your practice. A meditator proficient in body scan might be able to shift focus to a less reactive part of the body, such as the feet, to rest from the experience until they find enough stability and calm to proceed with normal practice. You could also do this in life, if for instance you have a tense meeting with opposing counsel and need to keep your cool.

Image with pictures of people meditating that has the quote "body scan is a building block to support further growth in your meditation practice"

Conclusion: Body Scan Meditation Is an Excellent Practice for Lawyers and Professionals to Try.

In short, body scan is a simple practice to learn and may be more accessible to new meditators than other styles of practice. It offers many benefits that support a meditation practice and build coping skills for life. Lawyers in particular could stand to benefit from the practice, so give it a try.


To understand more how important body-based practices are to lawyers and how to add them into your routine, check out the Personal Well-Being Worksheet, Stress Management Workbook, and Coping Strategies Ebook.

To try body scan practice, check out our meditations that incorporate body scan techniques.   


Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, How to Be a Badass Lawyer, for a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.

Like this post? Subscribe to the blog here or follow us on social media:

4 Heart Practices that Lawyers Should Know

Cover image with picture of four hearts and title that says "4 Heart Practices That Lawyers Should Know"

It’s Valentine’s Day this week, so it is only natural for my mind to be thinking about hearts. In this case, I am thinking about the heart practices or Brahma Viharas. I talk about loving-kindness practice here a lot because it is a wonderful practice for cultivating kindness and reducing judgment.

What are the Four Heart Practices?

In traditional Buddhism, though, loving-kindness is just 1 of the 4 heart practices that support good conduct and overall well-being. Each practice is unique but they all reinforce each other too. Lawyers or anyone who regularly deals with stress or conflict can gain a lot from working with them together.

Keep reading to learn more about the heart practices:

  • (1) loving-kindness;
  • (2) sympathetic joy;
  • (3) compassion; and
  • (4) equanimity.
Image showing four heart practices discussed in the post which are beneficial to lawyers: loving-kindness, sympathetic joy, compassion, and equanimity

1. Loving-Kindness

Loving-kindness or metta as it is traditionally called is done to generate friendliness and a good nature towards oneself and others. And when I say “others” here, I mean it as broadly as possible. As I have explained before, loving-kindness practice is done by bringing individuals and then groups to mind and sending them wishes of well-being.

Language here is flexible but the traditional phrases are:

  • May you be happy;
  • May you be healthy;
  • May you be safe;
  • May you be at peace.

Traditionally, this practice starts with oneself and expands outward to extend kindness to literally all beings.

There are many applications for this practice but the most common reason for doing the practice is to cultivate kindness for everyone, including you. With time, the practice serves as an antidote to judgment and anger, a foundation for greater mindfulness, and a gateway to the other heart practices.

Image explaining loving-kindness, one of the heart practices discussed in the post which is beneficial to lawyers

2. Sympathetic Joy

Sympathetic joy or “mudita” does not tend to get as much attention in my experience, but it is increasingly important these days. Anyone suffering from social comparison, jealousy, or in a competitive field can benefit from this practice. Yes, this of course means lawyers and most working professionals. That is because mudita is about cultivating joy in response to the well-being of others.

Mudita is commonly practiced with the same structure as loving-kindness but the phrases may be slightly different. Common sympathetic joy meditation phrases include:

  • May you be happy;
  • May your happiness continue;
  • May you appreciate your joy; and
  • I am happy for you.

As I discussed when I shared the interview of Tom Bussen, author of Enlightened Self-Interest, this practice can reduce jealousy, greed, and the impacts of living in a hyper-competitive culture.

Image explaining sympathetic joy, one of the heart practices discussed in the post which is beneficial to lawyers

3. Compassion

Compassion, or “karuna” as it is called in Sanskrit, is another essential heart practice. Unlike loving-kindness and sympathetic joy, compassion is about cultivating kindness in the fact of difficulty. As I have explained before, compassion isn’t truly an emotion but is instead a response to suffering.

Compassion is also distinct from empathy. It goes beyond merely feeling someone’s suffering, though common feeling is often part of the experience. Instead, compassion arises when we are aware of suffering and wish or act to do something to alleviate it.

I find that compassion is often specific to circumstances so I offer a variety of phrases that might work to practice compassion in meditation:

  • May you be free of suffering 
  • May you be safe and well in the midst of all this 
  • May you live with ease and with kindness in the midst of this 
  • May you be at ease with the changing conditions of my life 
  • May you open to this pain with gentleness and compassion 
  • May all who experience this particular suffering be held in kindness 
  • May the suffering of this world be met with compassion 
  • I care about you. 
  • Your suffering matters to me 
  • I see your suffering; it is hard.

It would likely become unwieldy to try to use all of these phrases, so it may be better to select 3 or 4 and work with those. Over time, you can change or substitute in phrasing to suit your needs. In addition, practicing compassion in sitting meditation is only the start. With time, this practice may support more compassionate conduct in life.

Image explaining compassion, one of the heart practices discussed in the post which is beneficial to lawyers

4. Equanimity

Equanimity, or “upekkha”, is a trait that can be and often is cultivated with ordinary mindfulness practices. Put simply, it is non-reactive stability in the face of change, difficulty, and uncertainty. Learning to sit and be with experience when you do a practice like breath focus or body scan can help you cultivate a foundation of equanimity that supports overall mindfulness and well-being.

Equanimity is also important from a heart perspective, though, because it is essential for balancing kindness, joy, and compassion. Recall that kindness does not mean just being “nice” and compassion does not mean sacrificing oneself in all cases. Equanimity supports healthy boundaries and clarity about our role in a given situation or relationship.

Like compassion above, equanimity might be affected by context. Here are a selection of phrases that you could use to cultivate equanimity in meditation:

  • All beings are responsible for the suffering or happiness created by their own actions;
  • May you find peace exactly where you are;
  • No matter how I might wish things to be otherwise, things are as they are;
  • I care for you, but I cannot control your happiness and unhappiness;
  • May we all accept things as they are;
  • I wish you happiness but cannot make your choices for you; and
  • I can allow what is here and offer what is needed.
Image explaining equanimity, one of the heart practices discussed in the post which is beneficial to lawyers

Conclusion

When done on their own, each of the individual practices has much to offer lawyers and other professionals. Over time, though, exploring all of the practices together can strengthen and stabilize the heart, body, and mind. Relationships are an essential part of living a good life and the four heart practices, loving-kindness, sympathetic joy, compassion, and equanimity, can support us as individuals in relation to other people. As you think about hearts this Valentine’s Day, think about the four heart practices too.


Like this post? Subscribe to the blog here or follow us on social media:

Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, How to Be a Badass Lawyer, for a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.

How to Craft Your Daily Meditation Practice

Cover image for blog post with title that says "How to Craft Your Daily Meditation Practice"

One of the most common questions I get as a meditation teacher is also my favorite question to ask other meditators. That question is “what does your meditation practice look like?” As a teacher, I know people are asking for guidance about what their practice should or could be.

When I am asking the question, though, I am not asking it to test the other person. Instead, I am asking it because someone’s daily practice can tell you a lot. I love seeing the variety of ways that people find to make meditation their own, so I enjoy hearing people talk about it.

Though certain lineages may have preferred meditation practices, there aren’t universally applicable rules that apply to all of us. In addition, even very experienced meditators may have to rethink or revamp their practice regimen from time to time. Here are some things to consider when crafting or reshaping your meditation practice.

1. Identify the Intention Behind Your Meditation Practice.

One of the reasons that I cannot offer a generally applicable “ideal” meditation practice is that I think meditation works best when it supports personal intentions. By this, I don’t mean that meditation must or should be a solely individualistic endeavor. I have said many times before that community is essential to meditation and that, ideally, meditation will help us engage more fully in our communities.

Even so, meditation is a long-term practice. If you are going to make the habit stick, it helps if it supports your life, values, and goals. As a result, an important first step in crafting a meditation practice is to consider your intention for meditating.

Do you want the health benefits? Do you want a time to rest? Do you want to learn better ways of managing stress? Do you want a time to check in with yourself? Do you want to relax so you can get better sleep? Whatever it is, identifying the purpose driving you can help you tailor a meditation practice.

Image with quote from the blog post that says "Meditation works best when it supports personal intentions."

2. Consider the Meditation Technique that Supports Your Intention.

Identifying your intention for practice is important because there are so many options for practice technique. Meditation practices come from a variety of spiritual lineages, secular disciplines, and include a seemingly endless number of techniques.

If your practice lasts long enough, crafting your meditation routine may include exploration of everything from breath focus, to body scan, mantra, loving-kindness, and beyond. Exploration is a great thing, but ideally your daily practice will become relatively simple, stable, and consistent.

Your specific purpose in meditating will help you decide which practice best supports your life. This may take some trial and error and experimentation. Pay attention to how you feel in practice and any changes that you may be experiencing in life. This can tell you if the practice is supporting your intention or not.

3. Decide the Frequency, Duration, and Setting for Your Meditation Sessions.

Once you have selected a practice, then you must decide how long, how often, and where to practice. Many people ask me for a minimum time they must practice to get benefits. Though I recommend starting small for those new to practice, ideally the duration of your sessions will grow over time. So, the real question is what amount of time will you, as a practical matter, meditate consistently?

That is because consistency is what transforms meditation from a pastime to a practice. As a practicing lawyer myself and a busy mom, I don’t claim to meditate every day without fail. But I meditate most days and strive for 30 minutes of daily practice. That period of time is sustainable for me long-term and it allows me to rest, connect with myself, and cultivate focus and stability.

In the same way, it helps to have a designated meditation spot which may include your meditation cushion or a comfortable chair. Meditation on the go is a necessary option for most lawyers and one I frequently use. With that said, a special spot can help to remind you of practice and settle more quickly when your meditation starts.

Image with quote that says: "People often ask for the “minimum” amount of time they must meditate to see benefits. A better question is: what amount of time will you, as a practical matter, meditate consistently?"

4. Don’t Forget to Ask for Help.

Still feel lost with all of the details regarding meditation practice? That’s normal. It could be a sign that you need some more exploration time to feel at ease in your practice. It could also be reason to consider getting more support for your practice.

Over the millennia, meditation has been taught in groups and with teachers. Technology has allowed us to learn the practice without these supports and I got my practice started without them. Whether you use guided meditations or prefer an unguided practice, starting with the help of an app (or this blog!) may be great for those of us who want to explore meditation before we commit.

For more in-depth understanding of the practices and the many shapes that meditation can take, you can always explore working with a meditation teacher, taking a course, or finding a community. Even if you meditate alone most of the time, getting help and support may instill confidence that you have a practice that supports your life.

Image that shares the 4 tips for crafting a meditation practice shared in the blog post

Conclusion

There are many effective ways that you can structure a daily or regular meditation practice. If you practice meditation for long enough, you are bound to find that your practice will shift and change with time. Whether you are new to meditation or are experienced and looking for a change, this post is offered to help you evaluate your daily practice to ensure it continues to benefit your life.


If you want some immediate help for your practice, check out the Resources page and our guided meditations. In particular, these downloads may be helpful in shaping a practice that works for you:


Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, How to Be a Badass Lawyer, for a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.

Like this post? Subscribe to the blog here or follow us on social media:

You Don’t Have to Be Good at Meditation

Cover image for blog post entitled "You don't have to be good at meditation"

I have seen a lot of comments on social media lately where people express an interest in meditation but complain that they just aren’t “good” at it. My answer usually includes some variation of the following: you don’t have to be good at meditation to benefit from it.

For lawyers and other Type A personalities, this may sound like crazy talk. Many of us are trained to think that we have to earn our stripes with something before it can help us. In truth, meditation is a skill and mindfulness and compassion are traits that can be strengthened with practice.

Meditation isn’t about mastery.

In this way, there is a learning curve when it comes to meditation. Does that mean meditation is fundamentally or principally about “mastering” the practice and becoming good at it? Not in my humble opinion.

To the contrary, meditation is sort of a rigged deck. Most people who do the practice never consider themselves good at it. This is because meditation is hard. Paradoxically, the simpler the style of practice one does, the more challenging you may find it to be.

The brain is not wired to stay focused on a single thing for very long. The default mode network of the brain kicks in when we are not intensely occupied and it causes the mind to wander. Thus, when you meditate, you are going against the grain (or should I say against the brain?).

Struggle is part of the practice.

In some ways, meditation is like strength training because the practice, in part, is learning to struggle. Though I generally enjoy exercise, I struggled mightily to build a strength training regimen a few years back. The reason? Strength training is not fun; instead it is a lot of struggle. When I do cardio, I get to move and enjoy music. But strength requires me to push really hard against a lot of weight.

Eventually, I got over this by figuring out a schedule that works and motivates me to keep going. One thing that helped me was seeing how much the strength training helped me. After a few weeks, I noticed that yoga was easier, cardio felt better, and those heavy doors downtown didn’t feel quite so heavy.

Image with quote: "In some ways, meditation is like strength training because the practice, in part, is learning to struggle."

Don’t expect benefits in your meditation practice.

The same is true in meditation. You probably won’t notice huge benefits when you are struggling to focus on the breath in meditation. Since the practice is to notice when the mind wanders, it may feel like a struggle even if you are doing the practice right. But, during this practice time, this experience of struggle may be normal.

This is why some people may say they aren’t “good at” meditation. They see and feel the struggle and think that they aren’t making progress or feeling benefits. In reality, though, meditation isn’t where you will see the benefits most clearly. Just like with strength training, the real question is whether the practice is creating benefits in your life.

Look for the benefits of your meditation practice in your life.

Look for signs that you feel better, mentally or physically. Pay attention to whether you notice your mind wandering in real life and whether you can refocus. Over time, you may notice even more changes like:

Image with quote: Don’t look for signs that meditation is working in your practice. Look for them first in your life.

If meditation feels like it is all struggle, though, get some help.

This is not to say, of course, that you should just “suck it up” when it comes to meditation. After practicing for a while, you should expect that the practice may get a bit easier and I hope you can learn to enjoy it. If that doesn’t happen, though, you may have some options for helping yourself.

You could try modifying your practice to make it more enjoyable. If you have a past history of trauma or other special needs, modifying practice may be essential as an act of kindness to yourself. You could also try working with a trained teacher or finding a supportive community. Taking a course to learn more about mind-body practices might help you too.

Conclusion

In short, I would encourage you as much as possible to let go of the idea that you have to be good at meditation. That’s not the point. Meditation is not about proving yourself, but just being yourself. The question isn’t whether you are good at meditation but instead whether it is good for you. Though I hope that anyone who tries meditation eventually learns to enjoy it, the signs that the practice is working for you are more likely to show up in your daily life.


Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, How to Be a Badass Lawyer, for a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.

Like this post? Subscribe to the blog here or follow us on social media:

Should You Enjoy Your Meditation Practice?

Cover image for blog post entitled "Should You Enjoy Your Meditation Practice?"

The other day, I made an audacious comment on social media. I posited that one “can and should enjoy meditation.” Now, this was on Threads, a platform with character limits. It was in response to someone else’s post about struggling with practice. When I made it, I assumed the comment was a pretty basic thing to say.

Despite my experience with social media, I was surprised when people responded to this with hostility. One person used actual profanity and another responded with a video, presumably to tell me I wrong.

The real issue here was probably that social media is not the best forum for clear communication. Even so, these surprising interactions got me thinking. Is it okay to enjoy your meditation practice? I think so. No longer shackled by character limits, I will explain why.

Expectations in Meditation Can Be Dangerous

The commenter who sent me the GIF of a meditation teacher telling me I was wrong had this point to make: looking to enjoy your meditation practice is often problematic. Meditation can lead to a reduction in stress, a more open mind, and heart, and many positive life changes. But it does so when we let it teach us.

Looking for meditation to be a certain kind of experience often blocks this. One of the biggest benefits of meditation is seeing things, ourselves, and the world clearly. It’s hard to see things clearly when you have a big goal in mind.

This is why, when I commented that one should enjoy meditation, I wasn’t saying that one should expect to enjoy meditation. Instead, what I meant was that if meditation becomes a regular part of your life, it really helps if you find something in it that you enjoy. In this way, it is good to be open to enjoying meditation practice while being watchful of expectations for your practice to feel a certain way.

Image with quote "Expecting your meditation practice to feel a specific way can lead to problems, but generally it’s a good thing to enjoy meditation."

Are You in Shape for Meditation?

The woman who reacted to my comment with hostility, I suspect, had a different problem. She expressed a lot of struggles with the practice itself. As I have written before, this can happen for a variety of reasons.

People new practice may have to build up a tolerance for it. I started at 1 minute day and even then found all the thoughts and feelings I had been ignoring most of my life to be overwhelming. Over time, I had to learn a lot about letting go and responding to myself with kindness instead of judgment.

The other piece of this, though, is that most of us are not learning meditation in an ideal way. Many of us may be learning from apps, books, or guided meditations. This is what I did, so I don’t knock it. However, I can’t tell you how much easier the practice got when I began working with teachers and developed a good community.

If your practice is far from enjoyable, consider whether you are still learning and whether you could support your practice more.

Every Session Won’t Be Enjoyable

Although I generally enjoy my meditation practice, the truth is that I frequently don’t. Sometimes I space out and barely notice it. Sometimes it is painful, physically or emotionally. And sometimes I resist doing it because I don’t want to face what is lurking in my mind and heart.

After years of practice I now know that this is just life. I normally love working out, practicing law, being with my kids, and writing. Depending on the circumstances, though, all of those preferred activities can become painful.

In the times when meditation, or any other healthy habit, feels hard, I usually have to adjust, simplify, and give myself a lot of grace. For this reason, the surprising thing is that I often learn and benefit as much from the hard times as I do from the experiences that feel great. So, of course, every meditation session won’t be enjoyable. That’s life and it’s okay.

In General, Enjoying Meditation Is a Good Thing

After you establish your practice and work through the initial hurdles, I hope that your meditation practice becomes generally enjoyable. When you pay attention, meditation can feel pretty good. For busy people, it may be nice to just stop and rest for a while. In addition, breathing deeply and relaxing the body can feel nice.

But enjoyment matters for practical reasons too. Just like exercise, meditation can’t affect you in a positive way if you don’t do it. Life experience teaches us all that we are a much more likely to repeatedly do an activity we enjoy. This is what I really meant when I said one “should” enjoy meditation.

This wasn’t a rule. Instead, it was a remark on practical realities. Meditation is much more likely to invite you to practice if you find something about it that you enjoy. In general, then, it is a good thing to enjoy your meditation practice.

Image with quote: "Meditation doesn't have to be painful to be effective."

But What If You Don’t Enjoy Meditation?

Now, what if you have been meditating for a while and you don’t enjoy meditation? This is something that is bound to come up for most of us, but what can we do about it?

If this were me, my first step would be to see if I can identify the issue. Sometimes things like the time or location we practice, the physical set up for our practice, or the style of practice can be the culprit. Making adjustments or finding better ways to support ourselves can work wonders.

Perhaps a better option might be to work with a teacher or find a meditation community. Years ago, a five-minute interview with a teacher on a retreat told me it was time to loosen my grip on focus practices and shift to open awareness. That led to insights I had never had before and turned my practice into a respite rather than a battleground.

You can also consider taking a break from practice for a while, trying another mind-body practice, or brainstorming ways to make you practice a bit more restful and enjoyable.

Conclusion

Meditation is not an easy practice, but I believe it is something that can and should generally be enjoyable to do. Many sessions will be tough and we should all watch out for expectations that our practice produce only blissful experiences. With that said, enjoying practice is a good thing because it may motivate us to practice. In addition, learning that and how to enjoy a practice like meditation can teach us a lot about life and ourselves.


Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, How to Be a Badass Lawyer, for a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.

Like this post? Subscribe to the blog here or follow us on social media: