It’s the beginning of a new year, so lawyers may be thinking about new years goals and resolutions. For many people, this might include the goal of exploring mindfulness or starting a meditation practice.
If this is your intention for the year, I think it’s a great one. But all of us know that noble intentions in January sometimes fade by February. How can you start a meditation practice in January that has the hope of lasting the year and beyond?
That’s why I wrote this piece. In this post, I will share some tips intended to help you explore meditation and turn it into a real practice.
Establish Meditation as a Habit
My first advice for lawyers exploring meditation is to start small. That isn’t only because it’s kinder to yourself. It’s also much easier to do something repeatedly if it takes less time.
The biggest problem many lawyers and professional have with meditation is finding the time to practice. Given this, it is essential to not overwhelm yourself at the beginning.
I started my meditation practice over a decade ago at 1 minute per day because that is all I could handle. Though I was quickly able to add minutes on as the days went by, this small increment of time meant I had very few excuses to skip practice.
This meant that I quickly established a habit of meditating every day. If you want the benefits of meditation, making the practice regular is important. To do this, start with short sessions but aim for regular, ideally daily, practice. If you need any more help on brainstorming meditation as a habit, download this free worksheet.
Focus on Building Skills Instead of Being “Perfect” at Meditation
Now, you may be worried that even if you make meditation a habit, you still don’t know what you are doing. So you may be worried about doing the practice wrong or wasting your time.
I have shared basic meditation instructions on this blog and posts about a variety of different meditation practices, including breath practice, body scan, joy, and loving-kindness. At the beginning, though, I would not worry so much about being right in meditation.
Of course, no lawyer wants to waste their time. But the mistakes in meditation are often the best teachers. Meditation is not a thought exercise. It is an experiential practice. You learn how to do the practice by meditating.
At the beginning, then, the object is not to be perfect but instead to cultivate some basic skills. These include the following:
- Patience with yourself;
- Focus (including which focal point works for you);
- Learning what calms and soothes you;
- Connecting with bodily sensations;
- Noticing when you are thinking;
- Redirecting attention; and
- Self-kindness.
Don’t Expect to See Quick Progress in Meditation
Many lawyers start a meditation practice because they want the benefits they have read about in research studies. They want to feel less stress, they want to be able to focus on demand, and they want more happiness and kindness.
Then they sit down in meditation and they feel stressed because they can’t focus. They feel tired and bored. Their feet fall asleep, their knees and back hurt. All of this is bound to make any reasonable lawyer think the practice doesn’t work.
But here’s the thing: the benefits of meditation often don’t show up in the practice itself, at least not right away. After a while, practice should come to feel a bit more enjoyable and soothing in itself. At first, though, you are still building skills. Expecting to see mastery in your practice is like expecting not to struggle at all when you start a new exercise routine.
This means that you should give yourself some time (four to eight weeks) before you look for any benefits to emerge. And if those benefits emerge, they probably will show up outside of meditation first. These might include things like rushing less, a reduction in the physical signs of stress, or less reactivity.
Though benefits very likely will emerge with consistent meditation practice, be cautious about your expectations. Don’t expect immediate results and look for the benefits in life first before they show up in meditation practice.
Keep Your Practice Simple
One of the problems that knowledge seekers like lawyers may encounter at first is that they can’t decide which mindfulness practice to explore. The list of skills mentioned above may suggest that you must master all forms of meditation in order to gain benefits. Allow me to set the record straight.
While it is great to explore a variety of practices, ultimately simplicity is ideal. Keeping your practice simple will reduce decision fatigue. This means that there is less chance that your actual practice time will be delayed or derailed by too many planning questions.
Over the years, I have done a variety of practices with and without guiding. Eventually, though, I settled into a simple routine that consists mostly of breath focus practice, open awareness, and loving-kindness. I generally don’t do formal body scan practices, but I enjoy them on occasion if I have a special need to relax or calm my body.
Based on this, it is great to explore and shop around with practices at first. After a few days or weeks, though, it is best to settle on the practice that allows you to relax and focus the most. This will allow you time to build proficiency with the practice, so that you can experience benefits and build confidence.
As the months and years go on, you can always adjust your practice. In fact, you may need to do so to address specific issues like increased stress, sleepiness or spacing out, or just to refresh your practice.
Don’t Go It Alone
I offer my last bit of advice with a strong sense of humility. When I started meditating, I practiced totally on my own. I had no teacher or community and at first hid my practice from my family.
It was not until years later that I realized the error in this approach. When I attended my first retreat, I was amazed at how supportive it was to meditate with other people. I couldn’t believe how helpful a few minutes of chatting with a teacher was.
Though many lawyers pride ourselves for our independence, we do best when we remember that humans are social animals. When we humans want to make real habit change, social support is the way to go. If you want to make meditation a lasting part of your life, finding a teacher or community should be a priority.
Now, as I said above, time is often a challenge for lawyers. I am no stranger to this. To be sure, meditation can be learned and practiced on your own and you should not feel ashamed at all about that. If, however, you have any options to meditate in a group, learned from a trained mindfulness teacher, or go on retreat, it will support your practice.
For anyone in the legal profession looking for such a community, the Mindfulness in Law Society provides a highly accessible option.
Conclusion
These are my tips for starting a meditation practice in the new year. They are offered to help busy people like lawyers be kind to themselves while forming a habit that can last. Regardless of the goals you set, I wish you luck in the new year and hope you find whatever practices support you and your community best.
Want to learn more about mindfulness and compassion? Check out my new book, How to Be a Badass Lawyer, for a simple guide to creating a meditation practice of your own in 30 days. And to share mindfulness with your little one, check out my new children’s book, Mommy Needs a Minute.
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